There are two kinds of developers. Those who have broken production and those who are about to.

Forget "have you tried turning it off and on again" - tech support is just dating with more troubleshooting and less romance. Both involve hours of frustration, miscommunication, and ultimately walking away wondering why you bothered. At least with tech support, you can hang up without getting ghosted first.

Content Time spent "Programming" Browsing reddit Singing along to my "Focusing Music" Testing Blankly staring at the screen because I don't want to debug Re-testing even though I already know it works, just because it's satisfying Actually Coding

Content Implementing support for the new UI Experiments? Nope! If you are not already aware, YouTube is experimenting an ugly user interface that completely breaks Enhancer for YouTube, so instead of wasting time trying to make my extension compatible with the current Ul and the experimental one, this new version of Enhancer for YouTube prevents YouTube from testing it on you U()

Content Top 20 Replies by Programmers when their programs don't work.. 20. That's weird. 19. It's never done that before. 18. It worked yesterday. 17. How is that possible? 16. It must be a hardware problem. 15. What did you type in wrong to get it to crash? 14. There has to be something funky in your data. 13. I haven't touched that module in weeks! 12. You must have the wrong version. 11. It's just some unlucky coincidence. 10. I can't test everything! 9. THIS can't be the source of THAT. 8. It works, but it hasn't been tested. 7. Somebody must have changed my code. 6. Did you check for a virus on your system? 5. Even though it doesn't work, how does it feel? 4. You can't use that version on your system. 3. Why do you want to do it that way? 2. Where were you when the program blew up? 1. It works on my machine.

Content I HAVE FINALLY PERFECTED ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE BUT NOW I FACE MY GREATEST CHALLENGE HOW DO I MAKE IT LOOK HOT SOUP-ERB Prod

The true developer search history we desperately hide from prying eyes. While normies worry about their partners finding dating apps, we're frantically clearing searches like "how to name variables without using profanity" and "why does my code only work at 2:37 PM on Tuesdays." The dependency hell search is particularly savage - that special place where your project depends on library A which needs library B version 2.1 but also library C which refuses to work with anything but library B version 1.8. It's basically relationship drama but with packages instead of people.