Basically Ruby On Rails

The eternal zombie apocalypse of PHP development in one perfect timeline! From 1995's "PHP is dead, use ColdFusion!" to 2002's ASP.NET hype train, through Ruby on Rails and Django eras, all the way to 2018's NextJS revolution... yet somehow PHP keeps shambling along despite three decades of obituaries. It's the cockroach of programming languages—surviving nuclear winters, framework fads, and endless "X is the PHP killer" declarations. By 2025, we'll all be attending its 30th birthday party while secretly writing The real joke? Half the internet still runs on it. Complicated love indeed.

The meme starts with a noble plea to "STOP making fun of different programming languages" followed by compliments for various languages: C is FAST, Java is POPULAR, Ruby is COOL, Python is BEAUTIFUL, Haskell is INTRIGUING... and then there's just "JavaScript" with no compliment whatsoever. The silent burn is absolutely devastating. Even in a post about not making fun of languages, JavaScript still gets thrown under the bus by omission. The programming equivalent of your mom saying she loves all her children equally and then forgetting to mention you.

Finally, a political compass that makes sense! Instead of left vs. right, we've got "System Lang" vs "Toy Lang" - because nothing starts a flame war faster than calling someone's favorite language a "toy." And instead of authoritarian vs libertarian, we've got "Obsolete Lang" vs "Nu Lang" - where COBOL programmers are still making bank while the rest of us chase shiny new frameworks every six months. The placement is savage. Assembly and C sitting proudly in the "real systems" corner while Python and Ruby hang out in the "scripting for children" zone. And poor Brainfuck got exiled to the furthest corner possible - exactly where it belongs. This is basically a Rorschach test for developers. Whatever quadrant your favorite language is in tells everyone exactly what kind of programmer you are... and whether anyone wants to sit next to you at lunch.

When your senior dev reviews your Elixir/Phoenix code and finds that sneaky logger statement you forgot to remove before pushing to production. The classic "Dose nuts fit in your mouth?" joke hidden in a Phoenix controller action is the programming equivalent of leaving a whoopee cushion on the CTO's chair. And let's be honest, no AI is going to understand why that's both hilarious and a career-limiting move.

When you're so lazy that you ask AI to write a "Hello World" program and then execute it directly without even reading the code. That final eval code is just *chef's kiss* - the perfect blend of modern efficiency and complete disregard for security. Nothing says "senior developer" like blindly executing code from the internet. Security team having a stroke in 3... 2... 1...

The syntax evolution of conditional statements is a wild ride! First we have "Elsif" - the fancy Pascal/Ada way that makes you feel like you're coding with a monocle. Then "elif" arrives as Python's sleek, minimalist approach (because who needs those extra letters anyway?). "else if" shows up as the sensible middle ground used in C/C++/Java that actually reads like English. But then... the posh British gentleman at the bottom with "otherwise" - that's some proper Ruby/Haskell functional programming elegance right there. It's like watching conditional statements get progressively more sophisticated until they're sipping tea with their pinky out.