Weve All Been There

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Content Senior Software Engineer A successful video company, with millions of users worldwide, is seeking a senior software engineer. Work-life balance flexible hours. The amazing well equipped offices are in Tel Aviv (near the train station). n"in n7u t D'Taly 200 - 50 Experience in developing large scale distributed systems. Deep understanding of strong Computer Science fundamentals: Object-Oriented design, data structures systems, applications programming and multithreading programming. 300 years of programming experience in Java or equivalent Object-Oriented language. Experience with SQL and NoSQL. Highly proficient in Linux environment. B.Sc in Computer Science or equivalent. Advantage: Experience with Big Data tools. Knowledge in algorithms, data-mining and machine learning. Experience in HTML, CSS, JavaScript, ReactS, AngularJS or other client frameworks.

The universal developer solution to compiler warnings: just put a decorative plant in front of the screen! Who needs to fix those 43 warnings when strategic foliage placement solves the problem instantly? This is basically the software equivalent of putting tape over your check engine light. Sure, your code might explode in production, but at least your desk looks nicer!

The classic resume inflation algorithm at work! What's funnier than watching someone transform the mundane task of screwing in a light bulb into what sounds like they single-handedly revolutionized NASA's illumination infrastructure. The deployment terminology is particularly chef's-kiss - as if changing a bulb involved CI/CD pipelines and a Kubernetes cluster. And let's appreciate the "zero cost overruns" metric... because spending $2 on a light bulb is definitely within budget parameters. Next time you update your LinkedIn, remember: you didn't just fix a bug - you "architected and implemented a mission-critical exception handling framework with 100% resolution rate."

Content they've survived for 600 million years without a brain A ray of hope for people that think HTML is a programming language

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