Unlimited Power Source Discovered In Tech Industry

The top part shows a bracelet that supposedly "converts stress into electricity." The bottom part shows what happens when programmers wear it—they literally burst into flames from the sheer amount of stress-generated power.

If tech companies installed these on their dev teams, they could probably power entire data centers during sprint deadlines. Forget nuclear fusion—we've been sitting on an infinite energy source this whole time: programmer anxiety during production deploys.