Haters Gonna Hate

PHP developers just casually flexing their collection of CVEs like they're Pokémon cards. The quote is a classic Bjarne Stroustrup gem about programming languages, but seeing it paired with PHP's security vulnerability hall of fame is *chef's kiss*. The irony here is delicious—PHP gets roasted constantly for being "outdated" and "insecure," yet it powers like 77% of the web. Sure, it has more CVEs than a cybersecurity conference has coffee cups, but guess what? It's still running your favorite WordPress blog, your e-commerce site, and probably half the internet. Meanwhile, those "perfect" languages nobody uses? Zero CVEs because you can't have vulnerabilities if nobody's attacking your non-existent production deployments. PHP devs are out here living rent-free in everyone's head while shipping actual products.