requirements Memes

Never Trust Users' Requirements
Databases Agile Programming Backend
14 days ago 186.2K views 0 shares
Never Trust Users' Requirements
The classic "just one small change" that breaks your entire data model. You design a perfect database with a unique constraint ensuring each user belongs to exactly one organization. The requirements were crystal clear. You even got it in writing. Then suddenly, the user who SWORE the relationship would "always be N:1" comes back asking if users can belong to multiple organizations. That look of horror is every database architect who now has to create a junction table, update all the queries, and pretend they're not dying inside. Next time, just assume every relationship is many-to-many from the start and save yourself the trauma.

The Spec Is Like A Treasure Map Except The Treasure Is Confusion
Programming Agile Debugging Testing
19 days ago 207.9K views 0 shares
The Spec Is Like A Treasure Map Except The Treasure Is Confusion
Client says "This is specification, it explains everything" and then hands you what appears to be a contestant on "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" looking absolutely bewildered at the question "Two Zero Two Four" with four different numerical answers (2024, 0044, 0024, 2044). It's the software development equivalent of being handed a fortune cookie and told it contains the complete architectural diagram. Sure, technically those are numbers on the screen, but good luck figuring out which one matches whatever cryptic requirement is floating around in the client's head.

Managers Have Been Vibe Coding Forever
Agile Devops Programming Debugging Testing
1 month ago 187.3K views 1 shares
Managers Have Been Vibe Coding Forever
The eternal corporate software development cycle in its natural habitat! First, a manager drops the mystical term "vibe coding" without any actual specifications. The dev somehow translates this cosmic brain request into actual code, only for the manager to "test" it without reading a single line of what was built. Then comes the inevitable bug complaints, followed by fixes, followed by more not-reading-the-code, and finally the chef's kiss: "good job but be faster next time" or a complimentary verbal beatdown. And just like your favorite trauma, it repeats indefinitely! It's like playing technical Whac-A-Mole where the mole is wearing a tie and has the power to schedule more meetings.

Common Sense Vs The Client
Programming Webdev Agile Testing Frontend
1 month ago 140.3K views 0 shares
Common Sense Vs The Client
The eternal developer's paradox: You spend hours explaining why a feature is technically unsound, logically flawed, and practically useless. Your entire team agrees it's a disaster waiting to happen. Then the client sees it and acts like you've invented sliced bread 2.0. That moment when your professional trauma gets mistaken for genius... and somehow you still have to support this monstrosity for the next five years. But hey, the invoice cleared!

When 'Quick Question' Turns Into A Full System Redesign
Programming Agile Debugging Frontend Backend
1 month ago 164.2K views 0 shares
When 'Quick Question' Turns Into A Full System Redesign
Oh sweet heavens, the AUDACITY of that innocent "quick question" that morphs into the NIGHTMARE of rebuilding the entire codebase from scratch! 😱 One minute you're happily sipping coffee, the next you're questioning every architectural decision you've made since 2015. Meanwhile, your brain is frantically running through all possible escape routes like a hamster on espresso. "Should I fake a power outage? Develop sudden amnesia? Or just silently contemplate how I ended up here while my soul leaves my body?" The existential crisis is REAL, folks!

Developers Call It A Bug, Product Managers Call It A Feature
Programming Agile Debugging Testing
1 month ago 139.4K views 0 shares
Developers Call It A Bug, Product Managers Call It A Feature
Oh, the classic corporate rebranding strategy! Water shooting uncontrollably from a broken pipe? Developers frantically point: "That's a catastrophic leak that'll flood the server room!" Meanwhile, Product Managers are already updating the pitch deck: "Behold our new dynamic hydration distribution system with multi-directional water feature!" Same disaster, fancier name, higher price tag. The eternal dance of software development where today's critical failure is tomorrow's premium offering if you just squint hard enough and use enough buzzwords.

Password Requirements: The Final Boss
Security Programming
1 month ago 143.9K views 0 shares
Password Requirements: The Final Boss
Admin: "Try a silly phrase for your password!" User: *types "Sausage-addicted Kookaburra too fat to fly"* Password requirements: "Your password must contain at least one uppercase letter, one lowercase letter, one number, and one special character." User: *stares blankly at screen, contemplating career change* The eternal struggle between helpful password suggestions and the arcane requirements that make you want to just use "Password123!" for everything.

Developers Call It A Bug, Product Managers Call It A Feature
Programming Agile Debugging Testing
1 month ago 164.8K views 0 shares
Developers Call It A Bug, Product Managers Call It A Feature
Same water leak, two completely different interpretations! The developer sees a catastrophic pipe burst that's about to flood the entire codebase. Meanwhile, the product manager has slapped a fancy fountain decoration on it and added it to the roadmap presentation. "Our innovative hydration system provides dynamic moisture distribution across the platform!" The classic dev-PM reality distortion field in full effect.

Adventures In Vibe Coding
Programming
1 month ago 178.5K views 1 shares
Adventures In Vibe Coding
OMG, the HORROR of taking things too literally! 😱 Someone's boss suggested "vibe coding" - probably meaning to code with good energy or follow the team's coding style - but INSTEAD they grabbed an actual vibrator! The absolute AUDACITY of miscommunication in tech! And those striped socks are clearly the mark of a developer who's given up on all professional boundaries. This is what happens when you don't specify your requirements properly, people! The sprint retrospective is going to be AWKWARD AF! 💀

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New Modeling Req Dropped
Databases Webdev Programming Backend
1 month ago 223.9K views 0 shares
New Modeling Req Dropped
Ah, the evolution of data modeling requirements! Rejecting mere "birth date" like it's some primitive Stone Age concept. But ISO-8601 timestamp with timezone? *Chef's kiss* That's the good stuff. Nothing says "I'm a serious developer" like demanding millisecond precision for when someone was born, because God forbid we don't know if little Timmy entered the world at GMT+5:30 or UTC. Next sprint we'll be asking for the exact coordinates of the delivery room and the barometric pressure at birth.

Make The Random Function More Random
Programming Agile Algorithms Debugging
2 months ago 260.4K views 1 shares
Make The Random Function More Random
Product manager: "The random function isn't random enough." Developer: "What does that even mean?" PM: "It needs to be more random. Make it randomier." The number of times I've had to explain that pseudorandom number generators are deterministic by design is directly proportional to my growing collection of gray hairs. Next they'll ask for the random function to generate numbers they personally like better.

Nothing Beats A Good QA Test
AI Programming Debugging Testing
2 months ago 191.2K views 0 shares
Nothing Beats A Good QA Test
Looks like someone found the first edge case in Taco Bell's AI system. Classic example of why you always need input validation. Some developer is probably updating their resume right now after forgetting to add a simple "if (waters > 100) { return 'Nice try, buddy' }". This is why we can't have nice things in production. Somewhere, a product manager is frantically updating the requirements doc to include "maximum order quantities" while the DevOps team drowns in incident reports.