Job hunting Memes

Posts tagged with Job hunting

Recruiters Be Like
Databases Webdev Programming Frontend
12 hours ago 64.1K views 0 shares
Recruiters Be Like
Imagine trying to connect to a database with CSS, the language responsible for making buttons pretty and text centered. That's like trying to open a door with a banana peel. Tech recruiters are infamous for writing job descriptions that combine technologies with the coherence of a toddler playing tech buzzword bingo. "Must have 10 years experience in a framework released last month" is practically a recruiting tradition at this point. Next week they'll be looking for someone who can "deploy microservices using Microsoft Paint" or "debug kernel issues with HTML comments."

And Afford Food
Programming Frontend Backend
23 hours ago 56.4K views 0 shares
And Afford Food
The tech market's brutal reality check in one meme! Remember 2021? Fresh grads had the luxury of choosing between FAANG companies throwing obscene compensation packages at them. Fast forward to today's tech recession where senior engineers with 10 YOE are fighting for positions that barely cover rent. The "buff doge vs. cheems" format perfectly captures how quickly the industry shifted from "I'm deciding between Google's $200K and Amazon's $220K packages" to "please just let me implement yet another CRUD app so I can afford ramen this month." Silicon Valley's hiring freeze hit harder than a production bug at 4:59pm on Friday!

Thanks Copilot
AI Webdev Programming Frontend
1 day ago 65.7K views 0 shares
Thanks Copilot
When GitHub Copilot writes your resume for you and decides to include a confession. Nothing says "hire me" quite like letting your AI assistant admit you're "not a good programmer" right after listing all your skills. At least the Tab Accept button is right there to quickly embrace your new identity crisis.

Green Squares = Instant Wealth
Git Webdev Devops Programming
5 days ago 67.1K views 0 shares
Green Squares = Instant Wealth
Ah yes, the sacred GitHub contribution chart—where quantity trumps quality. This person has 10,306 commits in a year, which is roughly 28 commits every single day . Either they're a coding superhuman or they've discovered the ancient art of git commit -m "fix typo" && git push automation. Recruiters see green squares and immediately think "coding genius" instead of "probable bot owner." The real skill here isn't programming—it's convincing people that updating README files 10,000 times is worth half a million dollars. And they say AI is coming for our jobs...

I'd Rather Work On Something That Contributes Positively To Society, Thanks
Programming
5 days ago 69.9K views 0 shares
I'd Rather Work On Something That Contributes Positively To Society, Thanks
Ah, the classic bait and switch of tech recruiting. That initial excitement when you hear "competitive salary and work-life balance" quickly evaporates when you realize it's for yet another blockchain startup trying to revolutionize digital pet ownership or whatever. After 15 years in this industry, I've developed a Pavlovian response to the word "blockchain" - it's basically shorthand for "we're burning VC money on a solution desperately searching for a problem." But hey, at least you'll get free kombucha and a foosball table while the funding lasts!

Queue The Crickets
Agile Programming
5 days ago 61.1K views 0 shares
Queue The Crickets
The modern developer's immunity to recruiter spam has reached legendary status. After years of "Hi {first_name}" messages and "exciting opportunities" that pay in exposure and free snacks, we've evolved strict filtering criteria. Six figures? Remote work? No agile ceremonies where I pretend to care about story points? Suddenly the recruiter has our attention. It's not that we're difficult—we've just been burned enough times to know exactly what we want. That awkward silence when the recruiter realizes they can't offer any of those things? Priceless. Almost as valuable as the 4 hours of my life I'll never get back from that "quick technical chat" that turned into implementing a binary tree from scratch.

State Of The Industry
Programming AI Algorithms
7 days ago 61.9K views 0 shares
State Of The Industry
When Indeed thinks your software engineering skills make you perfect for managing a fast food joint, but still has the audacity to include a "This is a bad match" button. The irony is delicious – unlike what you'd be serving at El Pollo Loco. The tech industry in 2024: Spend 10 years mastering distributed systems and microservices architecture so you can flip chicken and manage teenagers making minimum wage. But hey, you get to "apply your skills in a new industry" – because apparently writing code and cooking poultry require the same skill set!

I Have Work Experience
Javascript Webdev Programming Frontend
7 days ago 77.9K views 0 shares
I Have Work Experience
When your JS skills are so hot that recruiters think you can mix a mean cocktail. Nothing says "tech career pinnacle" like getting job offers to pour drinks because you know how to center a div. Five years of React experience and the algorithm thinks you'd be great at remembering which drinks need little umbrellas. Might as well put "can operate a blender" on your LinkedIn profile next to "full stack developer."

Glad To Hear You Never
Programming
9 days ago 59.8K views 0 shares
Glad To Hear You Never
That gleeful smile when your 15 years of coding experience, 3 GitHub repos with 1000+ stars, and custom-built compiler don't match their automated keyword filter looking for "5+ years experience in a framework released 2 years ago." Your resume never stood a chance against the mighty ATS that can't tell Python from a snake. But hey, at least they'll send you a rejection email in 6-8 business months!

Rejected In Less Than A Minute
Programming
10 days ago 67.7K views 0 shares
Rejected In Less Than A Minute
When your resume gets rejected faster than a PR with 500 merge conflicts. The timestamps don't lie - Accenture managed to both welcome and dump this poor developer in the same minute. That's efficiency you can't teach. Somewhere, a recruiter is getting promoted for optimizing the rejection pipeline to sub-60-second latency.

Stop It Pls: When Memes Become Interview Questions
Programming Javascript
11 days ago 72.6K views 0 shares
Stop It Pls: When Memes Become Interview Questions
That crushing moment when your industry's latest buzzword becomes your personal nightmare. While everyone's having a laugh about "vibe coding" (writing code based on feelings rather than logic), you're stuck in interview hell proving you actually know proper software engineering. Nothing says "fun career choice" like having to demonstrate that you don't just randomly place semicolons where they "feel right." The tech industry's obsession with trendy jokes somehow always translates into yet another obstacle between you and a paycheck.

Green Squares To Six Figures
Git Devops Programming Python
11 days ago 69.8K views 0 shares
Green Squares To Six Figures
When LinkedIn meets GitHub, truth bombs explode! This genius "Senior Data Engineer" created a script that automatically commits to GitHub every few minutes—making his contribution graph look like he's coding 24/7. Little did he know his "10-minute hack" would expose the entire tech hiring circus. The second part shows a recruiter drooling over this fake activity: "We offered him $500k without even interviewing!" Because apparently, a green GitHub grid is more impressive than actual skills. Who needs technical interviews when you can automate your way to looking productive? Remember kids, it's not about building useful things—it's about making sure your contribution graph looks like a radioactive lawn.