Thank God There Is TypeScript

Nothing ages you faster than remembering when scrollbars were chunky, reliable parts of the browser window that just sat there doing their job. Now we've got these fancy disappearing overlays that show up for 0.5 seconds before fading away like your hopes of maintaining backward compatibility. The real tragedy? Watching the frog age from "young dev with bright eyes" to "senior engineer who's seen too many UI frameworks come and go" in the time it takes for browsers to decide scrollbars should be ephemeral experiences rather than functional UI elements.

Content .AND HERE IS OUR DATA LAKE IT LOOKS REALLY WELL STRUCTURED YEAH, NO WORRIES DO YOLI THINK YOU CAN HANDLE IT? locations m price: SOL TABLE products ordersfinal.xlsx X FOLLOW TDDCOMICS ON fIS

The four stages of becoming a JavaScript developer: 1. Innocent excitement: "Ooh, a book about JavaScript!" 2. First encounter with callback hell: *uncontrollable sobbing* 3. Acceptance phase: *builds fortress of solitude with multiple monitors* 4. Final form: Bearded wisdom, thousand-yard stare, and a strong drink to numb the pain of yet another framework release. They grow up so fast when you feed them promises that never resolve.

Content OTO! 100011 010100 Claire King 6 CKTheQueen Sending a GET request anticipating failure then seeing the JSON printed successfully is like having an orgasm 18:46 111320 Twitter for iPhone

Content IF THE WORLD WAS CREATED BY A PROGRAMMER IN THE BEGINNING, THERE WAS THE HEAVEN AND THE EaRTH BUT THE EARTH WAS FORMLESS AND BUGGY, WITHOUT DOCUMENTATION BY toggl AND THE PROGRAMMER SAW THAT IT WAS NOT GOOD THEN YOU SAID "LET THERE BE LIGHT! BUT THE LIGHT DID NOT COMPILE. ON THE SECOND DAY. YOU MERGE WATER YOU CREATE A HACK SO THAT LIGHT IS PART THE LAND TO CREATE DARKNESS, YOU NEED TO HIDE THE LAND, BUT THat's OK CAUSE CREATURES WONT BE ADDED UNTIL LATER AND STACKOVERFLOW SAID IT'S FINE BUT BECAUSE OF THE DEPENDENCY, LIGHT BREAKS AS LAND IS ACCIDENTALL: FLOODED YOU CHECK STACKOVERFLOW (IN THE DARKNESS) IT's The thiRd DaY. TURNS OUT THE CREATURES NEEDED TO BE ADDED SOONER BUT THE CLIENT FORGOT to MENTION THAT You TRY TO ADD CREATURES YOU ADD THEM IN THE IN THE DARKNESS, BUT BROWSER USING COOKIES THERE'S NO LAND WITHOUT UNFORTUNATELY MAKES TuSM MORTAL LIGHT, AND YOU CAN'T HAVE LIGHT BECAUSE OF THE WATFO IT's THE FOURTH DAY. TURNS OUT THE ISSUES WERE CAUSED BY THE FLAT EARTH DESIGN YOU DECIDE TO USE C YOU ALSO USE STI TO CREATE A BALLOON FOR ABSTRACTIONS, AND THAT INFLATES THE EARTH IT WORKS OUT GREAT wITH NO COMPLICATIONS WHATSOEVER! IT'S THE FIFTH DaY YOU START ADDING PEOPLE TO HELP YoU. ON THE SIXTH DAY YoU LOOK AT THE CHAOS YOU CREATED DANGLING I YOU DECIDE TO CREATE THEM IN YOUR LIKENESS, WHICH IS A MISTAKE REACT THEY IMMEDIATELY POPULATE THE EARTH WITH HACKS, FADS AND UNNECESSARY JAVASCRIPT LIBRARIES JESUS. REACT FUCKIT.JS) QUERY YOU ATTEmPT TO LEAD PEOPLE BACK TO SENSIBLE PROGRAMMING BUT IT IS TOO LATE - EVERYTHING RUNS ON DEPENDENCIES. DAYTIMEAIR.JS SEA.JS REALISTIC.WAVES. JS gETTERBANKS.J BASE. JS GIRAFFE.JS ON ThE SEVENTH DAY You realLy want to REST, BUT YOU NEED oRGanISe aLL You've CreaTeD MONGODB TOGGL.COM MaRT VIRKUS ProdrammerHumor.io

Ah, the sacred GitHub contribution graph—where the greenness of your squares matters more than your actual skills! This marketing person just proved that tech hiring is basically a casino where the house edge is "having a pretty heat map." Forget degrees, experience, or actual coding ability—just make sure your contribution graph looks like a well-maintained lawn. $900k for a pretty pattern of green squares? Meanwhile, actual developers are frantically pushing commits to empty repos at 11:59 PM just to keep their streaks alive. The ultimate tech industry cheat code: don't learn to code, just learn to look like you code. Absolutely brilliant.