No More JavaScript On The Backend

Whoever invented timezones has a special place reserved in developer hell. Nothing breaks your soul quite like debugging why your app works perfectly in California but crashes in Tokyo at exactly 3PM. I've spent entire sprints fixing date-related bugs only to have some PM go "but what about daylight savings?" and watch my will to live evaporate. If I could time travel, I wouldn't kill Hitler - I'd find the timezone inventor and show them my git blame history.

Every developer's internal reaction when a non-technical friend starts with "I've got an app idea." The threatening pose perfectly captures that mix of dread and irritation we feel when someone's about to pitch their "revolutionary" app that's basically "Uber but for hamsters" or "Facebook but people are nice." What they don't realize is they're the 500th person to think they're the first to come up with it, and no, we don't want to build it for free in exchange for "exposure" or a mythical 2% equity that'll totally make us rich someday.

Content Hard to swallow pills JAVASCRIPT ISNTHARD. FRONTEND DEVS JUST COMPLAIN ABOUT IT BECAUSE ITS THE FIRSTTIMETHEY VE HAD TO DO ANYTHING THAT RESEMBLED PROGRAMMING

Content JavaScript 65 PHP 60 Try it Yourself How To Create a Skill Bar Step 1) Stop immediately. Abandon any desire to create a skill bar. What the fuck is 90 PHP anyway?

Finally, someone defined the data structure we've all been dealing with for years! That's what happens when you let the junior dev name the interfaces after a late-night debugging session. The properties are surprisingly accurate though - viscosity and amount are definitely numbers you'd want to track, and color as a string makes perfect sense. Just waiting for someone to add the optional "smell" property in the next PR.

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