I'll Be Backend

THE AUDACITY of clients to praise you for delivering on time when your code is literally held together with duct tape and prayers! 💀 That awkward handshake moment when they're all "thank you for your professionalism" while you're internally SCREAMING because 30% of your buttons are just sitting there, utterly useless, dumping their sad little lives into the console.log void. But hey, the client doesn't need to know that half your code is just digital confetti waiting to explode at the slightest provocation! Ship it and pray no one clicks the wrong thing!

The duality of tech content platforms in their natural habitat! On the left: "Stop Using React" with a modest 46 upvotes. On the right: "Just F***ing Use React" with a whopping 170 upvotes. Welcome to frontend development, where contradictory advice gets served up daily like it's a special at your local coffee shop. The algorithm knows what it's doing - feeding you completely opposite opinions so you can stay perpetually confused and keep coming back for more validation. The best part? Both articles probably make equally compelling arguments. Truly the Schrödinger's cat of web frameworks - React is simultaneously the best and worst thing ever created until you actually open the article.

Content Web developers Javascript is the best for web dev Nooo python is the best ML Devs Fuck matlab Fuck matlab

When your Discord registration is secretly running on a 486 processor from 1992. Ten minutes to check a nickname? In that time I could compile the Linux kernel, refactor my entire codebase, AND question all my life choices that led me to this moment. The spinning circle of doom is probably just a single-threaded function checking if your nickname contains any forbidden characters while simultaneously mining cryptocurrency on the side.

Left panel: A shooter with perfect form, deadly precision, and an arsenal of modern frontend frameworks and tools that have revolutionized web development over the last decade. Right panel: The guy who still uses jQuery in 2024 and somehow keeps hitting the target anyway. The web development equivalent of bringing a musket to a laser gun fight and still managing to take down the enemy. Respect.

When someone recommends their own library to you on Twitter and you just awkwardly say "thanks I'll check it out" knowing full well you'll never look at it. The TypeScript equivalent of nodding politely while backing away slowly. Classic developer social interaction in the wild.