Me Talking To Girls

The hierarchy of suffering in CS specializations perfectly captured in Toy Story scenes: Cybersecurity and Game Design students? Living the Buzz Lightyear dream - endless identical clones, mass-produced and overconfident. "To infinity and beyond!" (aka "I'll be making six figures right after graduation!") Operating Systems students? That's Woody with the maniacal grin. Sure, they're dealing with kernel panics and memory management, but they're still maintaining their sanity... barely. But those poor souls specializing in Compilers? Straight to the lava pit of despair. They're drowning in parsing algorithms, abstract syntax trees, and the existential dread that comes with implementing a lexer from scratch. Not even the garbage collector can save them from this hell.

The eternal struggle of every web dev! Can't find the perfect game? Just build it yourself! Because obviously knowing HTML means you're basically a Unity expert too, right? 😂 The skull whispering "Do it yourself" is basically every project manager after you mention any problem. And that last line about knowing one language means knowing them all? Yeah, that's what we tell ourselves right before diving into a new framework with nothing but Stack Overflow and pure delusion as our guides. The confidence-to-competence ratio in web dev is truly a masterpiece of human imagination!

Ah, the classic "scheduling your game release on the same day as Hollow Knight: Silksong" strategy. Bold move, Riddlebit Software, bold move. Nothing says "I believe in my product" quite like launching it directly into the shadow of one of the most anticipated indie games of all time. It's like scheduling your wedding on the same day as the Super Bowl and wondering why attendance is a bit sparse. I'm sure JETRUNNER will be fine though—just like how the Titanic was "fine" until it met that iceberg. September 4, 2025: The day thousands of indie devs collectively whispered, "Oh no."

The eternal struggle of every game developer who still lives with their parents. That crushing moment when Mom walks in, sees you clicking away at Unity or Unreal Engine, and assumes you're just wasting time on Fortnite again. The sad cat face perfectly captures that mix of indignation and despair when your career aspirations are dismissed as "playing games." Sure, I'm staring at a screen for 12 hours straight, but I'm creating worlds, not just living in them! Pro tip: Next time, just tell Mom you're "optimizing recursive algorithms for interactive entertainment systems." She'll either be impressed or confused enough to leave you alone.

The ultimate bloatware assassin: hire one dev with a potato laptop and rural internet as your team's performance gatekeeper! 🥔💻 Imagine trying to explain why your fancy ray-tracing feature won't load on their ancient 2GB RAM machine while they're legally permitted to roast you into oblivion. "But it works on MY machine" won't save you from their dial-up-powered wrath! It's like having a performance budget enforcer with actual consequences. Add unnecessary bloat? Face the ancient laptop tribunal and pray for mercy. The dream solution for a world drowning in electron apps that somehow need 16GB RAM to display "Hello World"!

Going to prison in 2009: GTX 480 was cutting edge. Coming back in 2023: "DLSS? Ray tracing? 40-series? Is this even the same planet?" The hardware acceleration gap hits harder than prison food. At least in jail you expect to get stabbed - graphics card prices these days are the real crime.