The Real Coding Time Distribution

Ah, the classic programmer character development arc! First panel: horrified at your week-old spaghetti code. Second panel: the redemption twist where you realize that being disgusted by your past code is actually a sign of growth. It's like your code is secretly training you through shame. "What kind of sleep-deprived monster wrote this garbage? Oh wait... it was me last Tuesday." The ability to recognize your past mistakes is the true power-up sequence. The real plot twist? Six months from now, you'll look at today's "improved" code with the same horror. It's the circle of dev life.

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Junior: "Where's documentation?" Senior: "I AM THE DOCUMENTATION!" The final boss of every legacy codebase isn't the complexity—it's the grizzled veteran who wrote it all and never bothered documenting a single line. Why write comments when you can just be summoned like some mythical creature whenever something breaks? Nothing says job security like being the human equivalent of a 600-page technical manual that nobody wants to read.

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The eternal programmer life cycle, reduced to its purest form: while(alive) { eat(); sleep(); code(); } . But wait—someone forgot a critical function! Without poop() , this infinite loop is headed for disaster. It's basically the software equivalent of forgetting to add garbage collection to your runtime. The system resources (in this case, your digestive tract) will eventually crash with a catastrophic "PoopOverflow" exception. Next time you're designing your life algorithm, remember all the essential biological functions—or prepare for some seriously unhandled exceptions.

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