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Content The 5 Stages of Debugging At some point in each of our lives, we must face errors in our code. Debugging is a natural healing process to help us through these times. It is important to recognize these common stages and realize that debugging will eventually come to an end. Denial This stage is often characterized by such phrases as "What? That's impossible," or "I know this is right." A strong sign of denial is recompiling without changing any code, "just in case.' BargainingSelf-Blame Several programming errors are uncovered and the programmer feels stupid and guilty for having made them. Bargaining is common: "If I fix this, will you please compile?" Also, "I only have 14 errors to go!" HOSt Anger Cryptic error messages send the programmer into a rage. This stage is accompanied by an hours-long and profanity-filled diatribe about the limitations of the language directed at whomever will listen. Depression Following the outburst, the programmer becomes aware that hours have gone by unproductively and there is still no solution in sight. The programmer becomes listless. Posture often deteriorates. Accentance The programmer finally accepts the situation, declares the bug a "feature", and goes to play some Quake.

The standard IT support flowchart, as demonstrated by passive-aggressive waterfowl. First, ask if they've tried the obvious solution. Then suggest vibe checking their setup. When all else fails, make the universal hand gesture for "works on my machine" and walk away. Support tickets don't fix themselves, but neither do users who refuse to restart their computer.

The quantum mechanics of software development! First tweet gives us "Schroedinger's code" - where your buggy mess exists in a superposition of working/broken until someone runs the code and collapses the wave function. But the reply delivers the knockout punch - if a client discovers your bug before you do, just smile confidently and say "Yes, that was TOTALLY intentional functionality." The universal developer's get-out-of-jail-free card that's been saving careers since COBOL was cutting edge. The ultimate professional gaslighting technique that somehow still works in 2024.

Content Finding bugs and giving advice on someone else's code during code reviews Trying to find a bug on my own code ProgrammerHumor.

When your weight variable hits zero and keeps decreasing, you don't disappear—you just wrap around to the maximum value! This is the programmer's version of weight loss where integer underflow turns you from a skinny stick figure into a buff dude instantly. No gym required, just exploit the data type limitations. It's basically the same hack that made Pac-Man playable after level 255. The thin person panicking about being "erased from existence" clearly never implemented proper boundary checks!

The eternal developer quest: finding the perfect library! You start all excited about solving your problem, then you find something promising that checks all your boxes. But wait—the GitHub repo's last commit was during the Obama administration, and the only response to "Is this still maintained?" is tumbleweeds blowing across the issue tracker. That moment when you realize you've built your entire architecture on digital quicksand... and now you get to explain to your boss why you need another sprint to replace a "perfectly good solution" that's secretly held together with duct tape and prayers.