It Really Happened

database sql Data types Bad practices Foreign keys Database administration Database design Data integrity Executive order String columns

Databases Programming Backend

1 year ago 402,611 views 1 shares

It Really Happened

database-memes, sql-memes, foreign-keys-memes, data-types-memes, bad-practices-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Ah, the classic database decree! On the left: "Foreign keys are illegal" and on the right: "All columns must be strings." It's basically the executive order that would make any database administrator contemplate a career change. Nothing says "I have absolutely no idea how databases work" quite like mandating string-only columns while banning foreign keys. Congratulations, you've just signed into law the creation of data integrity nightmares and query performance disasters! Next up: "NULL values are now taxed at 30%."

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Relevant xkcd: hacking | hacking-memes, try-memes, password-memes, email-memes, ssl-memes, IT-memes, rds-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

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2 years ago 49.0K views 0 shares

sadlyBecameMarketingBuzzwords | marketing-memes, algorithm-memes, rds-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content 2013 .. powered by our 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 Algorithm switch (card) E case 2: case 3: case 4: case 5: case 6: count; break; case 10: case "g": case "O": case "K": case "A": count--: break; 20 21 22 if (count 0) 23 return count " Bet" 24 25 else 26 return count " Hold" 27 7 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 2023 ... powered by our AI switch (card) E case 2: case 3: case 4: case 5: case 6: count; break; case 10: case "g": case "0": case "K": case "A": count--: break; if (count 0) return count " Bet" else return count " Hold"

You know you fucked up when you search for an error message and Bing suggests a suicide hotline...

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4 years ago 405.9K views 0 shares

You know you fucked up when you search for an error message and Bing suggests a suicide hotline... | javascript-memes, java-memes, stackoverflow-memes, stack-memes, try-memes, react-memes, node-memes, loc-memes, git-memes, github-memes, version-memes, reactjs-memes, mongodb-memes, typescript-memes, image-memes, http-memes, error-memes, search-memes, cli-memes, mongo-memes, overflow-memes, microsoft-memes, edge-memes, query-memes, ide-memes, graph-memes, graphql-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

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Anyone else hide ascii art pics of their pet in their code?

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1 year ago 77.5K views 0 shares

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Content E Welcome D Run L Cancel EXEC Hi Stanley SQLQuery1 - disconnected Disconnect Change Connection Stanley Estimated Plan E Enable Actual Plan E Enable SQLCMD - Export as Noi Messages 2:17:23 PM Started executing query at Line 1 80 88888888888 008.0008 888878808088888806808008888008888 888888880888888808888888780000848 ( 99 ( 78 (9998888888888888889800888(8 (8888 (8 (88 . .. (8 ( ( ( (8 ( ( 99999(88. (9 ( (9979998888, 11 ( 18(,((( That Alici .( ( ( (( ( ( (8 (, ( (, (98 ( (988 9888 499992222 1288888 18880

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8 months ago 863.1K views 0 shares

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