The Perfect On-Call Excuse

Content Dear recruiters, if you are looking for: - Java, Python, PHP - React, Angular - PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB - AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS - Linux system administration - Git and CI with TDD - Docker, Kubernetes That's not a Full Stack Developer. That's an entire IT department. Your truly

Content When vou are a junior engineer asked to review your senior engineer's PR, and is vour turn to point out flaws in the code Look at me. I'm the captain now

Oh honey, the AUDACITY of these cloud providers! 💅 First, Microsoft Azure is all "Our service is AMAZING!" Then the second you commit, they hit you with "Sorry, it's broken and our devs are too busy updating their LinkedIn profiles to fix it." The betrayal! Google Cloud's "FREE" service is the tech equivalent of that friend who offers to buy lunch then Venmos you for $47.82 plus tip. FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS?! I could've bought a mediocre gaming PC for that! And AWS? "It's EASY!" they say, right before you need a PhD in AWSology and an AI assistant just to figure out how to deploy a simple "Hello World." The documentation is basically "Figure it out, genius!" This is why developers have trust issues and drink coffee by the gallon. The cloud promised us heaven but delivered a very expensive, very complicated hell.

This brilliant mashup takes the classic Simpsons "Old Man Yells at Cloud" headline and replaces the actual cloud with AWS. It's that senior developer who refuses to migrate from his precious on-prem servers because "the cloud is just someone else's computer!" Meanwhile, he's still manually SSH-ing into servers and editing config files with nano while the rest of us are defining infrastructure as code. The cloud isn't stealing your job, grandpa—your resistance to learning Terraform is!

Ah, the eternal DevOps dilemma! On the left, we have fancy cloud services with their shiny logos and enterprise pricing that makes your CFO cry. On the right, those dusty beige towers sitting under someone's desk that were "temporarily" put there in 2003. The beauty of those floor desktops? They're practically free if you raid the storage closet, they're ALL YOURS (no AWS outage notifications at 2am), and that sweet, sweet fan noise that sounds like a jet engine during compile time. Who needs expensive white noise machines? Sure, cloud gives you scalability, but nothing scales quite like the pride of telling management "we saved $10k this quarter by using Dave's old gaming PC as our build server."

Content Backend Software Develo... D-Orbit Lisboa, Portugal in Candidatura simplificada Salvar Qualifications and Requirements Strong experience in Python programming (at least 3 years): Knowledge of asynchronous programming: Strong knowledge about Pythons' unit testing frameworks (preferably pytest); Experience in the use of Cython library for generation of python extensions; Strong experience in Java programming (preferable experience in Kotlin): Experience in maintaining Java based web applications: Strong experience in C programming; Strong experience in the use and design of REST APIs; Strong experience on event-driven architectures (pubsub pattern); Strong familiarity with Git distributed version control system; Strong experience of the use of commandline of the Linux based operating systems; Strong experience in debugging distributed applications potentially running in remote environments: Experience in agile development methodologies (e.g.. Scrum, TDD); Experience with applications that handle large datasets: Experience in implementing caching mechanisms (i.e., using Redis); Experience in NoSQL databases such as Cassandra and Redis; Experience in relational databases, namely PostgreSQL: Experience using Kafka, MQTT and Redis as message brokers: Experience in cloud-based environments, namely AWS; Experience in the definition and use of Docker containers; Experience in orchestration of docker containerized microservices using Kubernetes; Some experience in working under DevOps oriented methodologies: Pipeline definition: Test execution automation; Some experience in web application development using the microservices architectural paradigm; Experience in designing web-based applications considering the need for scalability, reliability and security; Experience with Jira framework: Experience of bash shell scripting; Experience in JavaScriptTypescript: Experience in authentication and authorization mechanisms; Experience with event bus technologies (e.g., Kafka);