The Great AI Elimination Fantasy

The joke brilliantly skewers how recommendation algorithms work in real life. Instead of having original preferences, ML models basically look at what's popular and say "I'll have what they're having!" It's the digital equivalent of copying the smart kid's homework, but with billions of data points. Collaborative filtering in a nutshell—why make your own decisions when you can just aggregate everyone else's? Next time Netflix suggests that documentary everyone's watching, remember it's just an algorithm at a bar asking what's trending.

Waterfall development starts with just wheels and slowly builds into a complete car, one piece at a time, in sequential order. Can't back up, can't change direction. Hope you spec'd the right vehicle. Agile takes a different route - start with a skateboard, then scooter, bicycle, quad bike, and finally a car. Each iteration is actually usable, unlike those lone wheels from waterfall. Then there's AI development: throw in Wacky Races' Mean Machine with three normal cars. Because nothing says "cutting edge technology" like randomly generating a monstrosity and hoping it doesn't kill anyone on the highway.

Nothing says "I'm a web developer" quite like sending someone a local file path at 6:16 AM. The sweet irony of claiming ChatGPT built you a "website" when all you've got is an HTML file sitting in your Downloads folder. Bonus points for the dramatic "your job is done for" declaration. Sure buddy, the entire web development industry is trembling at your revolutionary C:\Users\ben\Downloads\index.html that probably has all the functionality of a digital paperweight. Next time maybe learn what "hosting" means before declaring the robot apocalypse.

Ah, the ultimate job security plan! Turns out the one person AI won't replace is the colleague who contributes absolutely nothing. That sweet spot where you're so useless that even automation can't justify the ROI of replacing you. It's like finding a bug so bizarre that QA just labels it as "expected behavior" and moves on. The perfect defense against technological unemployment isn't upskilling—it's strategic incompetence!

The ultimate reverse uno card of modern programming! While CS students frantically copy-paste ChatGPT's answers hoping their professor doesn't notice, seasoned devs are out here playing 4D chess—deliberately making their clean, efficient code look like it came from an AI just to appease management's "AI integration" checkbox. Nothing says "I'm embracing the future" quite like downgrading your perfectly functional code with some random variables and unnecessary comments about "leveraging synergies." The irony is delicious.

Job requirements: 5+ years experience with LangChain. Google search: LangChain was launched in October 2022. Ah yes, the classic tech recruiter time-travel paradox. "Must have 5+ years experience with technology that's existed for 1.5 years." Next they'll be asking for senior developers who can code in languages that haven't been invented yet. Maybe I should update my resume to include my expertise in quantum programming from the future. The only way to meet these requirements is if you're literally the creator of LangChain or you've mastered the dark arts of resume chronology manipulation.