Windows Defender's Selective Protection

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The operating system hierarchy of suffering, perfectly summarized! MacOS treats you like a helpless child who needs guardrails on everything. Windows gives you the illusion of control with that shiny "admin" badge. But Linux? Linux throws you into the deep end with nothing but a terminal and says "figure it out, genius." Nothing says "I love pain" quite like spending your weekend compiling your own kernel just to get your WiFi working. It's not a real Linux experience until you've contemplated your life choices at 3 AM while frantically Googling obscure error messages that only three people on Earth have ever seen.

Microsoft Edge is basically the digital equivalent of that clingy ex who refuses to accept it's over. The meme shows the Edge logo photoshopped onto a character emerging from imprisonment, screaming "After ten thousand years, I'm free!" - which is exactly what Edge does every time you accidentally click its icon. Windows keeps it buried deep in the system, just waiting for that misclick so it can launch itself, set itself as default, and remind you about "better battery performance" like some desperate used car salesman. The only thing missing is Edge asking if you've thought about its feelings lately.

The double whammy of tech obsolescence. First panel: Microsoft announcing Windows 10 EOL (End of Life) in October? Meh, whatever. Second panel: Steam potentially killing game compatibility on Windows 10 just like they did with Windows 7? Now you have my attention! It's the classic tech cycle - not the official EOL that forces upgrades, but when your games stop working. Twenty years in the industry and the only constant is companies finding new ways to make your perfectly functional setup obsolete. Death, taxes, and forced OS upgrades - the holy trinity of inevitable pain.

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Nothing like the sheer existential dread of upgrading your PC only to watch it self-destruct! First, you proudly install more RAM thinking you're about to experience computing nirvana. Then the BIOS decides it's the perfect moment for an unexpected update—because clearly your consent is just a formality. But the true horror? Running Memtest86 and discovering your fancy new RAM sticks are about as functional as a chocolate teapot. That moment when your upgrade journey transforms from "I'm gonna have the fastest PC ever" to "Did I just waste $200 on defective memory?" in 3.5 seconds flat. The hardware equivalent of writing perfect code that somehow still returns 47 compiler errors.