Blocked By CORS: Heaven's Firewall

Whoever told Google that software development is "low-stress" clearly never had to fix a production bug at 2 AM while the CEO breathes down their neck. Next thing you'll tell me is that JavaScript frameworks don't change every 12 minutes and git merge conflicts resolve themselves! The irony is so rich it could pay off my student loans from that CS degree that promised me a "balanced lifestyle."

The eternal struggle of our people. Just like vampires hiss at sunlight and Superman cowers from kryptonite, programmers recoil in horror at light-themed IDEs. Twenty years in this industry and I've never met a senior dev who willingly uses light mode. Our eyes have evolved to thrive in the darkness of basement offices and midnight debugging sessions. White backgrounds? That's for interns and management who code once a year. The rest of us prefer our screens like our coffee - dark and keeping us alive through questionable life choices.

The tech revenue showdown nobody expected! While OpenAI's impressive $3.7B looks solid in its professional attire, OnlyFans struts around in flamboyant pants with nearly double the revenue at $6.6B. Just goes to show that while we're building sophisticated AI models and neural networks, the most profitable tech isn't always the most complex. Sometimes the simplest user-generated content model wins by a landslide. Venture capitalists frantically taking notes right now: "Less transformers, more... transformations?"

Ah, the natural habitat of the modern tech company, expertly dissected! The corporate ecosystem where CEOs float around like mythical beings while backend engineers blast gangsta rap and devise t-shirts with obscure references that only five people on Earth understand. The hierarchy is perfect - from the "office ninjas" who somehow conjure free snacks from the void to the "dev/SEO shamans" who perform their dark rituals of traffic generation. Meanwhile, customer support maintains their superhuman ability to say "no" without actually saying "no" - a skill more valuable than any coding language. And let's not forget the servers - the only ones actually working 24/7 without complaining about the coffee quality or demanding ping pong tables. Silent heroes indeed. The true magic of tech companies isn't the technology - it's somehow convincing everyone that Nerf gun wars and free snacks compensate for existential dread and imposter syndrome. Brilliant!

The unholy alliance of web development, visualized perfectly. Two bikes duct-taped together in the middle—just like how REST APIs connect our systems with the same level of engineering elegance. The backend sits there, functional but boring, while the frontend gets all the flashy colors and drinks juice boxes. And yet somehow this monstrosity actually moves forward, which is frankly more than I can say for most sprint planning meetings.

The classic "walks into a bar" joke format gets a brilliant CSS twist! When you use position: absolute in CSS, elements completely ignore the normal document flow and position themselves wherever they want—often causing total layout chaos. Just like how these CSS classes walked into one bar while somehow managing to knock over furniture in a completely different establishment. Frontend developers know this pain all too well—one misplaced absolute positioning and suddenly your navbar is floating in the middle of your contact form and your footer is somewhere in the stratosphere.