The Digital Hostage Situation

Content I'm starting my Training to become a Sys-Admin I'm mandated to learn Java, SQL and both agile as well as scrum made with mematic ProarammerHumor.io

Content You are a programming an intern It appears that the senior does not know how to code The senior schedules a code review It appears that the senior does not know how to code

Content Python: What if everything was a dict? Java: What if everything was an object? JavaScript: What if everything was a dict and an object? C: What if everything was a pointer? APL: What if everything was an array? Tel: What if everything was a string? Prolog: What if everything was a term? LISP: What if everything was a pair? Scheme: What if everything was a function? Haskell: What if everything was a monad? Assembly: What if everything was a register? Cog: What if everything was a typeproposition? COBOL: WHAT IF EVERYTHING WAS UPPERCASE? C: What if everything was like Java, but different? Ruby: What if everything was monkey patched? Pascal: BEGIN What if everything was structured? END C: What if we added everything to the language? C11: What if we forgot to stop adding stuff? Rust: What if garbage collection didn't exist? Go: What if we tried designing C a second time? Perl: What if shell, sed, and awk were one language? Peri6: What if we took the joke too far? PHP: What if we wanted to make SQL injection easier? VB: What if we wanted to allow anyone to program? VB.NET: What if we wanted to stop them again? Forth: What if everything was a stack? ColorForth: What if the stack was green? PostScript: What if everything was printed at 600dpi? XSLT: What if everything was an XML element? Make: What if everything was a dependency? m4: What if everything was incomprehensibly quoted? Scala: What if Haskell ran on the JVM? Clojure: What if LISP ran on the JVM? Lua: What if game developers got tired of C? Mathematica: What if Stephen Wolfram invented everything? Malbolge: What if there is no god? nixcraft

Content 5 Cal Users KnzAppData Local Programs Python Python37) new.py - Sublime Text File Edit Selection Find View Goto Tools Project Preferences Help Python notes.py knizjs new.py ese htm 1 import os def WindowsDiagnostics () 3 4 5 6 print ('Looking for problems") waitTimer (20000ms) print('Unable to fix the issue.')

THE AUDACITY of programming tutorials making it look so easy! There you are, thinking you're about to become the next tech billionaire, and suddenly your screen is SCREAMING at you about undefined variables and missing semicolons! The Matrix reference is just *chef's kiss* because instead of seeing glorious green code raining down like Neo, all you see is that soul-crushing traceback error telling you your precious 'hello_world' doesn't even exist. HONEY, THAT'S NOT JUST AN ERROR MESSAGE—THAT'S YOUR DREAMS CRUMBLING IN REAL TIME! Welcome to programming, where your first relationship is with Stack Overflow and your best friend is the red squiggly line!

Content Tweet Pranay Pathole PPathole lam: Single In a relationship Married Randomly trying solutions from top voted answers from Stack Overflow without even reading properly