C'Mon Python, Surely You Can Figure Out What I Meant

Content This is a motherfucking website. And it's fucking pertect. Seriously, what the fuck else do you want? You probably build websit nome page is going to get you some tuCKing Awwward banner vou ca in glue to the top corner of your site. You think your 40-pound Query file and 83 polyfills give IE7 a bones Shit's lightweight and loads fast Fits on all vour shitty screens ooke the came in all vour shitty browsers The mothernicker's accessible to every asshole that visits vour site Shit's legible and gets vour tucking De ss it vou had one instead of must )mo Dics of minsters drinkmo cottee You. Are. Over-designing. Look at this shit. It's a motherfucking website. Why the fuck do you need to animate a fucking trendy-ass banner flag when I hover over that useless piece of shit? You spent hours on it and added 80 kilobvtes to vour fucking site. and some mothertucker jabbing at sep that chit but they don't see any You never knew it but this is vour perfect website Here It's fucking lightweight This entire page weighs less than the gradient-meshed facebook logo on your fucking Wordpress site. Did you seriously load 100kb of Query UI iust so vou could animate the fucking backeround color of a div? You loaded all 7 fontfaces of a shitty webfont iust so vou could say "Hi" at 100px height at the beginning of vour site! It's responsive You dumbose You thought von needed media queries to be reeponeive buteo Responsive meane the it sec to screensize it's viewed on This site doesn't care if vou're on an iMac or a motherfucking Tamagotchi It fucking works Look at this shit You can read ; Courses I'm Currently Teaching (1995) so vou and vour bitch-ass brows It has content on the fucking ser Fall 1995 me clel- come bebling button t ILS tags nd make CS101: How to literally use for-loops CSS89: You will seriously get rekt by this course dont take it Last edited: Sep. 29. 2016 Contact Information Phone: (333) 425-5253 Fax: (333) 888 - 3424 Email: iohn(at)universitv(dot)edu Office: Generic Hall. 415 M. N. Shamalavan Publications M. N. Shamalayan. "Combining Neural Networks With Natural Language Processine to Optimize the Hitler Problem." (ICSE-1998). M. N. Shamalayan. "Using Unguided Prim Trees to Solve the Matrix Mul- tiplication Problem" (ICSE-2000) M. N. Shamalavan. Using Large Dataset Combined with Support Vector Machine to Solve the Ice-Cream Optimization Problem. (ICSE-2002)

Content Tim Myers denvercoder Sorting an array when you're paid hourly. index.html X style.css X script.is X const arr 120, 5, 100,1, 90, 200, 40, 29; for (let item of arr) setTimeout ( () console. log(item), item) CONSOLE 1 5 20 29 40 90 100 200 7:19 AM 32721 Twitter for iPhone 100 Retweets 24 Quote Tweets 825 Likes ProarammerHumor.io

OH. MY. GOD. This is the most REVOLUTIONARY sorting algorithm of our time! 💀 Who needs bubble sort or quicksort when you can just HALLUCINATE your sorted data?! The audacity of this function to claim O(0) time complexity while literally DELETING your original data and returning a completely made-up sorted list! It's the computational equivalent of "I don't like reality so I'm creating my own." Computer science professors EVERYWHERE are having simultaneous heart attacks. But hey, technically it's the fastest sorting algorithm in existence since it doesn't actually sort ANYTHING! Pure. Evil. Genius.

Content Python programmers realising that the upvote button is

OMG, the BRUTAL TRUTH of programming stereotypes just slapped me across the face! 💅 Assembly/C++/Java programmers? ABSOLUTE MUSCLE-BOUND CHADS who wrestle with memory management like it's their personal gym equipment. Rust devs? Dramatic theater kids constantly SOBBING about borrowing and ownership. JavaScript developers? Literal MILITANTS ready to fight you over whether semicolons are necessary. And then there's Python - the INTELLECTUAL who will explain to you in EXCRUCIATING detail why their language is superior while adjusting their glasses. I'm SCREAMING at how accurately this captures our collective programming personalities!

When you can mentally rotate a 4D hypercube in your head but suddenly become illiterate when asked to visualize nested loops. The buff doge confidently shows off his spatial reasoning skills, while the wimpy doge just stares at four nested for-loops like they're written in ancient Sumerian. The punchline? That glorious cascade of closing brackets: } } } } – the telltale sign of someone who either writes machine learning code or has given up on life. It's the programming equivalent of those Russian nesting dolls, except each doll contains existential dread and off-by-one errors. The title references Lisp's infamous parentheses situation, where closing a function looks like )))))))) – except now we've upgraded to curly braces. Progress!