When People Ask Me How My IT Job Is Going

Content Tweet YandereDev YandereDev God I wish there was an easier way to do this private bool sEven(int number) if (number 1) return false; else if (number 2) return true; else if (number 3) return false; else if (number 4) return true; else if (number 5) return false; else if (number a 6) return true; else if (number 7) return false; else if (number 8) return true; else if (number 9) return false; else if (number 10) return true; else if (number 11) return false; else if (number 12) return true; else if (number 13) return false; else if (number a 14) return true; else if (number 15) return false; else if (number 16) return true; else if (number 17) return false;

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BREAKING NEWS: Trillion-dollar tech giant taken down by... *checks notes*... a blank field! 🤦‍♂️ Google engineers deployed code with ZERO error handling, no feature flags, and then pushed a policy with blank fields that created a null pointer that spiraled into a crash loop ACROSS THE ENTIRE PLANET in SECONDS! The internet's backbone CRUMBLED because someone couldn't be bothered to write an if-statement! And the best part? This disaster is from THE FUTURE! 2025! Time-traveling bugs are apparently Google's new specialty! 💀

Content WHEN I BRAG THAT I'M A SELF TAUGHT PROGRAMMER MY CODE

Ah, the infamous "leftpad incident" – when the entire JavaScript ecosystem collapsed because someone got mad about a package name. 11 lines of code that could've been written by a junior dev in 5 minutes brought down Facebook, Netflix, and Spotify. Why? Because the modern web is basically a house of cards built on thousands of dependencies that nobody actually reads. This is why I drink. The most powerful companies in the world, with billions in market cap, were paralyzed because they couldn't figure out how to pad a string with spaces without importing a package. NPM: Need Package Madness. Where we'll happily import 700MB of node_modules to avoid writing a for loop.

Content PROBLEMS IN YOUR PERSONAL LIFE? CHOOSE A CAREER IN PROGRAMMING NO PERSONAL LIFE NO PROBLEMS.