Vibe Coding: I'm A Developer Now

The universal IT solution that works 60% of the time, every time: turning it off and on again. Nothing quite matches that smug confidence when you stroll into a meeting after "fixing" a critical system by simply hitting restart. Meanwhile, actual IT support people are chasing you down like "WAIT! We need to check the logs first!" Too late. I've already ascended to tech hero status with my sophisticated troubleshooting technique that dates back to the stone age of computing.

Content When do you shutdown your laptop? Programmers. "We don't do that here"

Someone said "C isn't hard" and then proceeded to demonstrate the exact opposite. That syntax is the programming equivalent of those Russian nesting dolls, except each doll inside is progressively more haunted than the last. Nothing says "beginner-friendly" like declaring an array of pointers to functions that return pointers to functions that return void. I've seen clearer instructions written in ancient Sumerian.

Content Madison Kanna Madisonkanna It's absolutely wild that being good at interviewing for the developer job and being good at the actual job are two completely separate skills. 1:43 AM Jan 25, 2023 691.5K Views 599 Retweets 95 Quote Tweets 6,918 Likes

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of programming languages to name their string-splitting functions with such DRAMA! 💅 Java's all proper and boring with its lowercase split() - just SCREAMS "I have a CS degree and iron my jeans." 🙄 Then C# struts in wearing a TUXEDO with that capital S in Split() like "I'm basically Java but with STANDARDS, darling." ✨ But PHP? HONEY! PHP chose VIOLENCE with explode() because apparently splitting strings isn't DRAMATIC enough! Why divide when you can DETONATE?! The function literally TERRORIZES your strings into submission! I. CAN'T. EVEN. 💣

Content BY O toggl Goon SquAD DEVELOPER LIMBO- BEING AWAKE OUTDOoRs aT NoON (WITH NO ACCESS TO A PLAYSTATION) PRObLE AND DOCUMENTATION DOCUMENTATION MARKETING SALES- REALLY SUCKS "YOU'VE ALREADY CODED HALF YOUR SITE? O LESS WORK FOR US, AMIRITE ? " TECHNICAL RECRUITERS - "HEY GIRL, DO YOU KNOW JAVASCRIPT? GLIENTS NEW IDEAS "HANDS-ON " CLIENTS "MINOR CHANGES" THE FIXER' SCOPE CREEP UCTIC MANAGEMENT Now iM JUST ONE TALKING AGOVI IT DONE YE USELESS MeETING BAD cODE TO LOOK AT YOUR OLD CODE LEGACY CODE TERRIBLE SOLUTION HOLDING EVERYTHINZ TOGETHER YOUR GES IDE INTERNAL AD-HI ITERRUPTiONS MESTERDAY MTHICAL PLACE WHERE STUFF HAS TO BE READY YEAH (ACCORDING TONI GE TO INFO FR TOMORROW "ARE YOU DOING ANYTHING?" TACIRCLE HOPELESS PLACI A BROKEN COFFEE MACHINE MART VIRKUS '17 Proarammer-umor.to TOGGL.COM