I Am A Developer (Just Not During Interviews)

Content I Am Devloper iamdevloper Me: Flat Earth Society people are just plain silly Also me: If I run my code again with zero changes, it'll maybe work 9 49 17 900 4k Flat Earth Society FlatEarthOrg Replying to iamdevloper I mean, if you're writing JavaScript, that's not the worst approach. 4:20pm 12 Sep 2018 Twitter Web Client 3h

Look at that shower tile pattern—it's literally a GitHub contribution graph in your bathroom! Meanwhile, your own GitHub profile is emptier than a cache after clearing browser history. The shower is out here making daily contributions while you're still debugging that same for loop from last Tuesday. Guess who's getting more stars on their repos? Not you, buddy.

The eternal battle between security teams and developers rages on! Security wants SAML (Security Assertion Markup Language) implemented in a dev environment that's literally called "isolated" for a reason. The developer's response? A middle finger and an offer to enable 2FA on static accounts—which is like putting a state-of-the-art lock on a cardboard box. It's the perfect encapsulation of the security-versus-convenience standoff that happens in every enterprise. Security folks wanting Fort Knox protocols for sandboxes while developers just want to ship code without jumping through seventeen authentication hoops for an environment where the worst thing you could leak is test data shaped like "foo" and "bar".

The four-panel perception gap of being a programmer is painfully accurate. Society thinks we're hardware wizards fixing computers. Parents brag we're rocket scientists inventing the next big thing. We imagine ourselves as algorithm geniuses solving complex equations. Meanwhile, reality hits hard: just another dev frantically Googling "How to use dates in JavaScript" for the 47th time this week. The cognitive dissonance between our self-image and the daily "wait, how do I do this again?" struggle is the true essence of modern programming. Ten years of experience and still can't remember Date formatting without Stack Overflow's help.

Content GitHub Notch Retweeted Definitely Not Dan DefN... 2h Replying to notch Read your code aloud and put it on Amazon as an audiobook. O g 17 15 216

Content MOVE BRAVE GUYS MUSE EXCEL AS A DATABASE dataartisan1