Happy New

The beautiful lifecycle of a software developer: wake up, crush some code, close tickets, repeat. This skeleton is literally powered by the dopamine rush of dragging those Jira cards from "In Progress" to "Done." It's like a twisted fitness routine where instead of leg day, you've got ticket-closing day, and your gains are measured in story points instead of muscle mass. The real workout here is maintaining the discipline to actually update your tickets instead of just shipping code and ghosting your project manager. Some devs can bench press 300 pounds but can't lift a single ticket into the done column without being asked three times in standup. This skeleton clearly has its priorities straight—those quads are built purely from the repetitive motion of ticket management. Pro tip: If you're not getting swole from ticket velocity, you're doing agile wrong.

Content I'm a model on Instagram Cool, I'm a hacker in watch dogs 2

Content Who the hell you think you're talking to?! so many developers are getting fired, you think it's easy for them to find someone Walt admit you're in pangel that can understand all of this? and if even if they found him, it will take him ages you know how much money they are going to lose if I just decided to stop going to work? even if I told you wouldn't believe it. 1am not in Danger Skyler, I AM THE DANGER You think the manager jokes and I should fake laugh begging him to keep me?! 1 AM THE ONE WHO JOKES

Content When your application needs an extra feature after release R N O g

Content ..coo Verizon S 9:10 AM 0000 Verizon S 9:10 AM eco Verizon 9:10 AM What do vou know about material design? Oct 19, 2016, 10:22 PM Enough to know that Blue 600 is e88e5 hex codes are hot Damn boy let me GIT some of that So is iava wouldn't mind giving you a unit test Oh don't tease me like that hope you're agile, be this just became a standup meeting Only if I can call you CSS cause I like your style hope we can merge without any conflicts Let's do a pull request so we can commit and make it official call me scrum master cause I find all vour use cases Do you approach your sprints in waterfalls because you're making me wet the time and cost dont matter as long as I can scope out that ass Oat 19, 2016, 11112 PM Are you enterprise architecture because I like vour structure and how you operate Oct 20 2016, 762 AM fyi I'm sharing this convo with my coworkers Oh I'm 100 doing the same Oct 20 2018 8:27 AM hope vou're ready to deploy this package Oct 20.2016. 9:37 AM. Wanna come over later because I got a few things I want to demo from my local Oct 20, 2016, 11:28 AM as long as you can debug my performance girl let me gather vour reguirements 0620 2018 12:11 PM hopefully my user experience leaves vou satisfied ProgrammerHumor to

Content I'm a JavaScript developer What's a JavaScript developer? It means he can't do simple maths No, it doesn't. 12 (2' . 12 Stop it Patrick, you're Scaring him! made with mematic