Don't Be Like John

The eternal debugging cycle in its purest form! The smug Senior Dev asks how the intern fixed a bug, expecting some technical wizardry. The innocent intern proudly admits they just "commented the code" - literally removing the problematic code from execution. Tom's horrified reaction is EXACTLY how senior devs feel when they realize the codebase is now littered with /* TODO: Fix this later */ comments hiding broken functionality instead of actual fixes. The dreaded "it works if you don't run it" approach to software engineering that haunts code reviews everywhere!

Content if(x5) ff(x-toString0)equals(-07) catch(DivideByZeron retur true; tughip com

The evolution of every developer's coding style! At first, you write verbose conditional blocks like some kind of coding newbie. Then one day, you discover the ternary operator and suddenly you're wearing sunglasses because you're just that cool. Why waste 6 lines checking if a == 0 when you can flex on everyone with return (a == 0) ? true : false; ? Of course, the truly enlightened would just write return a == 0; but that wouldn't make for such a sassy Pikachu meme, would it?

Ah, the seven deadly archetypes of every engineering team. I've worked with all of these people, and I've been all these people—sometimes in the same sprint. My personal favorite is "The Silent Operator" who hasn't spoken since the company holiday party of 2019 but somehow commits the exact fix at 2 AM while everyone else is arguing in Slack. And don't get me started on "The System Rebuilder." Sure, event sourcing sounds amazing in theory—right up until you're explaining to the CEO why the shopping cart needs six months of refactoring. The real unicorn is someone who's none of these. If you find them, lock the door and hide their passport.

Content Sorry we're looking for someone aged 22-26 with 30 years of experience

Content Microsoft is evil but Google is noble and good And Other Hilarious Jokes You Can Tell Yourself Volume II imoflio.com