This Is Your Final Warning

Content Mayank Joshi dermayank Dear recruiters, if you are looking for: - Java, Python, PHP - React, Angular - PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB - AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS -nix system administration -Git and CI with TDD - Docker, Kubernetes That's not a Full Stack Developer That's an entire IT department 3:52 PM 29 Jun 21 Twitter for Mac 1,403 Retweets 117 Quote Tweets 5,532 Likes 17 ProdrammerHumor.io

THE AUDACITY! W3Schools pretending to teach us C# with an .php file extension in the URL, then switching to PHP with an .asp extension?! The ULTIMATE BETRAYAL of web development! It's like ordering a pizza and getting a sandwich wrapped in pizza box. The irony is so thick you could compile it into an executable and it would STILL throw errors. Whoever spotted this deserves a medal for exposing the web development equivalent of wearing socks with sandals. PURE CHAOS!

Content Memeloper iammemeloper STOP making fun of different programming languages C is FAST Java is POPULAR Ruby is COOL Python is BEAUTIFUL PHP JavaScript is AWESOME Haskell is INTRIGUING

For nearly three decades, developers have been declaring PHP's funeral while hyping the next hot framework. ColdFusion, ASP.net, Django, Rails, Flask, Angular, Next.js, Python—they've all taken turns as PHP's supposed executioner. Yet there it stands in 2025, like some immortal deity rising from the clouds, declaring "As you can see, I am not dead." PHP is basically the tech world's cockroach—it would survive a nuclear apocalypse while React is still trying to resolve its dependencies.

The elegant evolution of string splitting functions across languages, from Java's sensible split() to C#'s fancy uppercase Split() ... and then there's PHP with explode() – because why use normal terminology when you can pretend you're Michael Bay destroying strings with dramatic explosions? PHP developers really woke up and chose violence for their function naming conventions. Imagine explaining to a non-programmer: "Yes, I'm just going to explode this string into pieces. Don't worry, it's normal here."

Ah, the eternal bathroom standoff between PHP and literally everyone else. After 30+ years of being the internet's punching bag, PHP devs have developed the thickest skin in tech. While other languages come and go with their fancy new paradigms, PHP just keeps chugging along like that legacy codebase nobody wants to touch but somehow powers half the internet. The best part? By 2025, PHP devs won't even flinch at the hate. They'll just be counting their WordPress maintenance contract money while the "modern" JavaScript framework of the week implodes spectacularly. Remember: PHP has been "dying" since 2004, yet somehow still runs 77% of the web. That's not a language—that's a cockroach with job security.