Object-oriented Memes

Posts tagged with Object-oriented

Java Variable Names: The Enterprise Edition

Java Variable Names: The Enterprise Edition
The look of pure existential dread when you're forced to name your variables in Java. What started as a simple "client" spiraled into that monstrosity of a name because some architect decided every single responsibility needs to be in the variable name. This is what happens after 7 years of "clean code" seminars and too many design patterns. Meanwhile in Python land, they're just using "c" and moving on with their lives.

Open Source Baby

Open Source Baby
Ah, the classic "my baby is a Python program" approach to parenting! These parents clearly skipped the manual and went straight to GitHub for child-rearing instructions. The baby is literally instantiated as a class with genetic inheritance parameters, has an infinite loop for living (with mandatory sleep cycles), and comes pre-programmed with self-confidence. The yield Bardak() function is clearly what happens after feeding time. And that be_awesome() method with the comment "# Nothing to do.. already awesome" is basically how all developers see their own code before the code review. Bet this kid's first words will be "Syntax Error".

Damn My Professor Isn'T Very Gender Inclusive

Damn My Professor Isn'T Very Gender Inclusive
Ah yes, the classic binary gender implementation! When your professor thinks human identity is just a boolean value. 🤦‍♂️ In the real world: "What's your gender?" "Well, it's complicated..." In this database: "What's your gender?" "true." "Wait, what does that even mean?!" Somewhere a non-binary person is trying to hack the system with a NULL value and causing a database crash. Whoops!

Day 1 Of Becoming A Programming God

Day 1 Of Becoming A Programming God
Ah yes, the sacred first step to coding divinity - buying the Gang of Four book! Nothing says "I'm about to become a programming deity" like ordering the Design Patterns bible and having it arrive in a beat-up Amazon package. The journey of a thousand abstractions begins with a single Factory Pattern! Bonus points if you display it prominently on your desk for six months without actually reading past chapter 3. We've all been there... ascension to godhood pending...