Data modeling Memes

Who needs 50 different data types when you can just slap everything into a JSONB column and call it a day? This is basically PostgreSQL developers discovering MongoDB's entire business model. The tweet shows the ultimate database hack: create a table with just an ID and a JSONB field that's essentially a shapeless blob of whatever garbage you want to throw in there. Schema? We don't know her. Data integrity? Never met her. It's the database equivalent of shoving everything under your bed when your mom tells you to clean your room. And the best part? This is exactly what MongoDB has been selling as a "feature" all along. Turns out you can have NoSQL chaos in your SQL database too!

Ah yes, the classic binary gender implementation! When your professor thinks human identity is just a boolean value. 🤦‍♂️ In the real world: "What's your gender?" "Well, it's complicated..." In this database: "What's your gender?" "true." "Wait, what does that even mean?!" Somewhere a non-binary person is trying to hack the system with a NULL value and causing a database crash. Whoops!