To All You Java Enjoyers Out There Why Do You Do This

Content IJ

Content Saying Java is Good Because it works on all Operating System is like saying Anal Sex is good because it works on all SPECIES

Content JAVA21 WILL INTRODUCE UNNAMED CLASSES AND INSTANCE MAIN METHODS 21P WEARE USING JAVA17 17P WEARE THERE IS NEWER STILL ON JAVA 11 VERSION THAN SP

Content PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT HAS ALMOST NO STANDARD LIBRARY SOLUTION: THOUSANDS OF COMMUNITY -SUPPORTED LIBRARIES OF WILDLY VARYING QUALITY PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT HAS NO PACKAGING OR A LINKER TO TIE THESE PACKAGES TOGETHER PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT WON'T RUN OUTSIDE THE BROWSER SOLUTION: V8 PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT IS SINGLE -THREAD BY DESIGN SOLUTION: ASYNCHRONOUS PROGRAMMING, NODE. JS PROBLEM: CALLBACK HELL PROBLEM: PROTOTYPAL INHERITANCE IS PANTS -ON- HEAD STUPID THAT'S RIGHT, I SAID IT. PROBLEM: WEB RESOURCES NEED TO BE MINIFIED AND ZIPPED FOR PERFORMANCE PROBLEM: THE DOM IS TOO SLOW FOR VIDEO GAMES SOLUTION: CANVAS PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT IS TOO SLOW FOR VIDEO GAMES SOLUTION: USE AN ASSEMBLY- LIKE SUBSET OF JAVASCRIPT CALLED ASM.JS PROBLEM: ASM.JS IS BASICALLY UNWRITABLE 4 HUMANS. SOLUTION: COMPILE A BETTER LANGUAGE TO JAVASCRIPT (C, EMASCRIPT 2016, COFFEESCRIPT, JSX) SOLUTION: HUNDREDS OF COMMUNITY SUPPORTED BUILD TOOLS OF WILDLY VARYING QUALITY PROBLEM: GRUNT. SOLUTION: GULP PROBLEM: GULP PROBLEM: MACHINE GENERATED OUTPUT IS MORE DIFFICULT TO DEBUG PROBLEM: ASYNC IS STILL A NIGHTMARE, HUH? PROBLEM: BALLOONING PROJECT SIZE AND COMPLEXITY PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT STILL DOESN'T DO EVERYTHING PROBLEM: OUTPUT RUNS VERY SLOWLY ON MOBILE DEVICES SOLUTION: ELECTRON, PHONEGAP, FIREFOXOS HOW IS DIGGING GOING TO GET US OUT OF THIS HOLE? WHERE I AM FROM, THE POINT OF DIGGING IS NOT FREEDOM FROM DIGGING

Content Python devs making fun of javascript Meanwhile python: myint: int "a string myint 'a string' type(myint) kclass 'str'

Ah yes, the classic developer job listing that thinks Docker, JVM, and "third-party APIs" are exciting tools. Nothing gets a developer's blood pumping like integrating with yet another poorly documented API that changes without notice every three weeks. The sarcastic "CAN'T WAIT" reaction perfectly captures the enthusiasm gap between HR's idea of "exciting tools" and what developers actually find exciting. Sure, I'll spend my days wrestling with Docker permission issues and JVM heap sizes while pretending this is my dream job.