And I Write Garbage Professionally

Content Is Your Child Texting About Programming Languages? What your C obsessed teen's texts actually mean omg - one more generic wtf -wheres the function fml - for my loop idfc - indentation doesn't feel correct lol - logic on loop aka - abhorrent kafkaesque arithmetic rofl - right-oriented frame layout imo - iteration may overload stfu - statically typed feels unwise brb - bad recursion brb

Content CSS SUCKS Programming sucks UserInputSucks Computer Science is half-remembering something and googling the rest. 12:23 AM 20 May 19 Twitter for Android 30 Retweets 140 Likes

Oh honey, nothing screams "romance on public transit" quite like someone sketching UML diagrams on their phone. Our girl here spots a guy drawing and her heart does a little flutter thinking she's found a fellow creative soul, an ARTIST in the wild! But plot twist—he's drawing class diagrams with methods, attributes, and relationships. The sheer betrayal! The emotional whiplash! She went from "maybe he's sketching the sunset" to "oh god it's a database schema" faster than you can say "inheritance hierarchy." But let's be real, UML diagrams ARE art... just the kind that makes your eyes glaze over in software engineering meetings while your soul slowly leaves your body.

Java developers evolving their equality-checking techniques like they're climbing the social ladder at a fancy dinner party. First panel: The peasant's approach with == that compares memory references instead of actual content. How primitive! Second panel: The middle-class obj1.equals(obj2) method - respectable, gets the job done, but lacks a certain... je ne sais quoi. Third panel: The aristocratic Objects.equals(obj1, obj2) with its monocle and top hat - handles null checks and prevents NullPointerExceptions with the elegance of someone who has staff to handle their exceptions for them.

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Content STOP DOING RECURSION Functions were not supposed to call themselves YEARS OF WORK vet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for YEARS OF WORK - Statements dreamed vo by the utterly Deranged - Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged - Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged (This is REAL computation, done by REAL computers): STOP DOINGERISO STOP DOINGRORSO STOP DOING POURSU ???? ???????? ?????????????????? "Hello I would like to Hello I would like to Halo 1 would tike to They have played us for absolute fools