Why Does My Laptop Take Forever To Start?

When your Notepad app somehow needs 8GB of RAM just to display "Hello World" but some absolute madlad is out here trying to run GTA 5 on a PlayStation 3 with the processing power of a calculator watch. The duality of modern software development is absolutely UNHINGED. On one side, we've got bloated Electron apps that could probably run a small country's infrastructure but instead just... open text files. On the other side, game developers are performing literal black magic to squeeze every last drop of performance out of hardware that should've retired years ago. It's giving "I spent six months optimizing my sorting algorithm to save 2ms" versus "I just downloaded 47 npm packages to center a div." The contrast is *chef's kiss* levels of absurd.

Ah yes, the government official who clearly graduated from the "Stack Overflow School of Technical Facts." The classic "30 FPS is all you need" myth being delivered with such bureaucratic confidence is peak programmer pain. Meanwhile, PC gamers with their 144Hz monitors are having physical reactions to this statement. It's like when your product manager declares "the bug is now a feature" with the same authoritative hand gestures. The real performance minister is the one who optimizes your garbage collection, not the one who can't tell the difference between slideshow and smooth animation.

The fiery hellscape that is your boot sequence when you've allowed every launcher, storefront, and service to automatically start with Windows. Doom Guy would be proud of your PC fighting through Chrome, Steam, Discord, EA, Epic, Ubisoft, Spotify, and whatever else demands immediate attention before you can even think about doing actual work. Pro tip: the startup folder isn't meant to be a collection of "everything you've ever installed."

The EXISTENTIAL CRISIS of staring at two buttons labeled "Ray Tracing" and "Path Tracing" and having ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE what unholy difference exists between them! 💦 Meanwhile, your GPU is SCREAMING in the background as you toggle between settings that might as well be labeled "Make Computer Hot" and "Make Computer SLIGHTLY HOTTER." The audacity of game developers to assume we know what these rendering techniques do beyond "pretty graphics go brrr" is just... *chef's kiss* MAGNIFICENT.

Samsung really looked at the AI hype train and said "hold my semiconductors." While everyone's busy building massive data centers that consume enough power to light up a small country, Samsung's just casually standing there with Micron like "yeah, we make the memory chips that make all this possible." The real winners of the AI gold rush? Not the prospectors—it's the people selling the shovels. Or in this case, the people selling the RAM and storage that keeps those GPU clusters from turning into expensive paperweights. Classic tech ecosystem moment: the infrastructure providers quietly printing money while everyone else fights over who has the best LLM.

Talk tech specs at work and you're either a hero or a threat. When Valve does it, they're adorable. When PCMR does it, suddenly HR needs to have a chat. Classic double standard. The difference between "passionate about gaming" and "this guy might hack the payroll system."