I Guess I Am Older Than I Thought

Remember when buying a GPU was just an expense and not a second mortgage? In 2009, dropping $500 on a graphics card felt like a splurge. Fast forward to 2025, and you're staring at a $4,799 price tag with the same horrified expression as someone who just found out their entire codebase has no comments. Thanks crypto miners, AI enthusiasts, and whatever unholy alliance of market forces conspired to make rendering pixels cost more than my first car. At this rate, we'll soon be trading organs for ray tracing capabilities.

Congratulations! You've just witnessed a technological funeral without even sending flowers. Remember when we'd spend hours burning installation CDs, driver discs, and backup DVDs? Now we just click "download" and forget physical media exists. That beige CD drive is basically a museum piece now—like finding a dinosaur fossil in your desk drawer. The silent tragedy is that some poor Verbatim disc factory worker probably shed a tear the day cloud storage took over and nobody noticed. Pour one out for those 700MB circular heroes that got us through the pre-broadband dark ages.

The EXCRUCIATING PAIN of hearing someone call the monitor "the computer" or explain how they "downloaded more RAM" from a sketchy website! That face is the PHYSICAL MANIFESTATION of every developer's soul slowly leaving their body while nodding politely through gritted teeth. We're just sitting there, blood pressure skyrocketing, mentally screaming "IT'S NOT A VIRUS, YOUR COMPUTER IS SLOW BECAUSE YOU HAVE 47 CHROME TABS OPEN WITH FACEBOOK GAMES!" But instead we smile and say "Have you tried turning it off and on again?" because we're professionals... dying inside, but professionals.

When your monitor claims to run at 169,998 Hz but the human eye can only see up to 60 Hz anyway. Congratulations, your friend just bought the Ferrari of monitors to drive it exclusively in school zones. That's like buying a quantum computer to run Minesweeper or hiring a Michelin-star chef to make you toast. The marketing department must be high-fiving each other for convincing someone they need refresh rates measurable only by scientific equipment.

Spending $2000 on a high-end GPU but refusing to upgrade that ancient 1080p monitor is the tech equivalent of putting premium gas in a '98 Honda Civic. Sure, you're pushing 144fps in Cyberpunk, but it's like watching an IMAX movie through a keyhole. The sweet irony of demanding 1440p content when your display can't even show the extra pixels – just developer logic at its finest. Your GPU is basically sitting there, underutilized and judging your life choices.

Ah, the classic hard drive heist. The only time a physical data breach announces itself so politely. Your entire thesis, family photos, and that Bitcoin wallet from 2011? Gone. Just like that. No sophisticated malware or complex phishing attack—just someone who physically removed your drive and is now taunting you about it. This is why backups aren't just a good idea, they're the only thing standing between you and a mental breakdown at 2PM on a Tuesday.