I Play Outside

Content PROGRAMMING EXPLAINED WITH MUSIC PHP IS COUNTRI IT SUCKS BUT IT'S EVERYWHERE y toggl JAVASCRIPT 15 A ONE-MAN BAND. IT DOES EVERYTHING (THOUGE): IT PROBABLY SHOULDN'T C IS HARD ROCK - IT USED TO BE PRETTY POPULAR BUT MOST PEOPLE HAVE OUTGROWN CSS IS MUMBLE RAP- ANYONE CAN DO IT AND IT DOESN'T MAKE YOU A PROGRAMMER HASKELL IS JAZZ - COMPLEX, BUT INCREDIBLY pOWERFUL AND FLEXIBLE (IF YOU KNOW HOw USE SWIFT IS U2-YOU HavE IT BECAUSE APPLE GAVE IT O YOU JAVA IS AN OBSCURE 17-CENTURY SYMPHONY - YOU HAvE To TAKE A CLASS To KNOW ABOUT IT. LISP IS BLACK METAL - NO ONE UNDERSTANDS IT AND ITS FaNg MaKE PEOPLE NERVOUS MART VIRKUS '19

The ultimate tech billionaire self-own! Elon confidently declares the Social Security database isn't de-duplicated, suggesting massive fraud... only to get absolutely demolished when someone points out he clearly has no idea how government databases work. The cherry on top? The "readers added context" feature on his own platform confirming that yes, the government does indeed use SQL. Nothing quite like spending $44 billion on a platform just so everyone can watch you get publicly schooled on basic database concepts. This is what happens when you skip Database 101 but still think you're qualified to critique government systems. Maybe next time Google "what is MySQL" before tweeting?

Content Ber Learn programming for future work Learn programming to understand programming jokes Berni Learn programming to know how to use google better than a normal person

Content ME DREAMING OF THE PERFECT APP WITH ALGORITHMS WHILE HAVING A SHOWER MY ABILITY TO CODE

The expectation vs. reality of online programming courses hits harder than a production bug on Friday afternoon. Top panel: "What they promise" - a perfect object detection model identifying everything with impressive confidence scores. "Yes, after this course you'll build YOLO models that can detect a mosquito from space!" Bottom panel: "What you actually learn" - a basic linear regression with scattered data points that barely fit the line. "Congratulations, you can now predict housing prices with 60% accuracy and call yourself a 'data scientist' on LinkedIn!" The brutal truth is most courses promise you'll become the next AI genius, but you'll end up struggling to remember which way the x and y axes go. And somehow they'll still charge you $499 for the privilege.

Ah, the classic escalation protocol when your rubber duck has failed you. That smug smile says it all - "I've upgraded to a real duck now, checkmate universe." For those complex bugs where explaining your code to a yellow plastic bath toy just isn't cutting it anymore. Sure, the duck won't actually respond with solutions, but at least this one can judge your terrible code with authentic avian disappointment. Next step: hiring an actual programmer to sit silently while you explain your spaghetti code. Though fair warning - unlike the duck, they might actually laugh at your variable naming conventions.