Oh, the corporate laptop as a job security oracle! 🔮
Dell = 3 strikes policy. Classic corporate America with its rigid HR policies. "Did you try rebooting your career?"
MacBook = startup life in a nutshell. Your job security is directly proportional to the VC's bank account. Hope those ping pong tables were worth it!
Lenovo ThinkPad = government job stability. The laptop that survives nuclear blasts and the employee who survives every round of layoffs. Both equally indestructible.
And if HP had made the list? Probably "Your printer will jam before your career does."