Well, At Least I Don't Have To Worry About Fur

Ah, the future of gaming where you'll need not one but TWO entire PC towers to run Chrome with three tabs open. Nothing says "progress" like having a separate computer dedicated to each side of your ultrawide monitor. The real joke is that Windows will still look exactly the same in 2030 as it does today. And those RGB fans? They'll be consuming more electricity than your refrigerator, but hey, at least your frame rates will be high enough to render all those Windows update screens in glorious detail.

When your power supply is literally smoking but tech support insists on running through their entire script before admitting the obvious. This is the perfect illustration of the eternal battle between users who can see their computer is on fire and tech support who needs you to turn it off and on again first. Because clearly, the NOSMOKE module being incompatible with your power supply isn't as obvious as the actual smoke pouring out of your case. And the final punchline? Microsoft can't help because NOSMOKE isn't compatible with your power supply. You don't say! Next they'll tell you that water isn't compatible with electrocution.

Ask Bing how to fix a production bug and you get... a hammer labeled "HARD RESET." Because nothing says "sophisticated debugging" like physical violence against hardware! It's the digital equivalent of kicking the vending machine when your snack gets stuck. Sure, turning it off and on again works 60% of the time, every time—but that other 40%? Hope you've updated your resume. The true senior developer move is pretending the server crash was actually "scheduled maintenance."

When you've exhausted all debugging options and Bing suggests the most elegant solution: physical violence. Nothing says "I've tried everything else" like taking a hammer labeled "HARD RESET" to your production server. The universal IT troubleshooting flowchart: 1) Try to fix it properly 2) Google solutions 3) Bing solutions 4) Destroy the hardware. Works 60% of the time, every time.

Remember when game installers tried to convince you that NVIDIA graphics would transform your blocky LEGO characters into... slightly less blocky LEGO characters? The classic InstallShield wizard showing identical Lego Star Wars screenshots but claiming one has "NVIDIA graphics" is the grandfather of today's RTX memes. The difference is about as noticeable as semicolons in JavaScript - technically there, but who's really checking? Graphics card marketing has been gaslighting gamers since before ray tracing was cool.

The classic illusion of choice in software installations! You're given two options - "Express Installation" which you reject because it sounds suspiciously like it'll install 17 toolbars and change your homepage. Then there's "Custom Installation" which you eagerly select to maintain control... only to discover it has exactly the same options as Express. It's like when you spend 10 minutes carefully configuring installation settings just to end up with the default configuration anyway. The software equivalent of asking "Do you want it my way or... also my way but with extra clicks?"