Git Ignore Everything

When your GitHub repo name creates a comedy goldmine without even trying. This developer's project "ANUS" has spawned the most gloriously inappropriate issue titles in open source history. "ANUS is too tight, needs LUBE" and "Add penetration tests" aren't bugs—they're features of accidental innuendo. The best part? These are legitimate technical requests with completely innocent intentions that sound absolutely filthy out of context. Naming your repo is truly the most consequential decision a developer will ever make.

OH. MY. GOD. Behold the pinnacle of software engineering! Two whole lines of code that redefine variables to... exactly what they already are! 🤦‍♀️ This "ultimate python boilerplate" is the equivalent of telling someone "water is wet" and expecting a Nobel Prize. The sheer audacity of creating a repo for this masterpiece of redundancy! And it's 26 whole bytes! Such efficiency! Such innovation! I'm absolutely DYING at how this captures the essence of those GitHub repos that promise revolutionary code but deliver the programming equivalent of a ham sandwich without the ham.

Behold the future of coding: a three-button keyboard that distills programming to its purest form—Copy, Paste, and a logo that's probably GitHub or StackOverflow. The hardware manufacturers finally figured out what we actually do all day! Why write original code when someone on the internet already solved your problem? The "expert" part is knowing exactly which code to steal and how to make it look like you understood it in your commit messages. Future job interviews: "How efficiently can you Google?"

The eternal CI/CD death spiral in its natural habitat! What we're witnessing is the beautiful disaster of a developer's 48-hour wrestling match with GitHub Actions. Starting with existential dread ("god has abandoned us"), progressing through false hope ("fixed CICD finally"), then the desperate environment variable tweaking, config file adjustments, and finally the primal scream of "pls fix workflow :))))" – which is developer code for "I'm one failed build away from a career change." The commit messages tell the whole tragic story: ten commits over two days just to get a workflow running. The real kicker? That "fixed CICD finally it was literally 2 lines smh" – the universal experience of spending 8 hours debugging only to find you forgot a semicolon.

The modern developer's balancing act, visualized with stunning accuracy. That precarious tower of cans represents what's actually holding up your code—a foundation of ChatGPT at the bottom (let's be honest, it's writing half your functions), Google searches above it (for the errors ChatGPT creates), followed by pure dumb luck, ancient GitHub repositories you found at 3 AM, and tutorial videos from that one Indian guy who explains algorithms better than your $200K computer science degree. And finally, at the very top, desperately balancing on this tower of digital desperation? Your actual code—looking just as confused as that dog wondering how it got up there and how long before the whole thing collapses during the next sprint review.

OH. MY. GOD. Someone just discovered GitHub isn't the download section of Best Buy! 😱 The ABSOLUTE TRAGEDY of trying to find that precious .exe file on a platform that's LITERALLY DESIGNED for source code sharing! It's like walking into a library and having a meltdown because they don't sell hamburgers! THE HORROR! GitHub stores CODE, sweetie - you know, those magical text files developers use before they're compiled into executables? You're supposed to clone the repo or download the source and build it yourself like a grown-up developer! But sure, let's blame the "weirdest file sharing site" because clicking that big green "Code" button and understanding what a repository is would be TOO MUCH EFFORT! 💅