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Content M MuyiwaSaka Single-handedly managed the successful upgrade and deployment of new environmental illumination system with zero cost overruns and zero safety incidents. consigliere moyodre 050919 How would you write "I changed a light bulb" on your resume? 7:24 PM 050919 Twitter Web App

Content closed miku-chan03 opened this issue on 18 Oct 2017 2 comments miku-chan03 commented on 18 Oct 2017 Contributor 5 HIr- 1 fixie wixied the JSON-api fucksy wucksie!!! xpp I repwaced the Prototypes. func wiff a more -streamylined- kawaii Pwototypiee. funkywunks object that make the JS go sooper dooper fast!! D starts twerking Can u pwease merge my pwull wequest senpai?!! UwU gaearon commented on 19 Oct 2017 Contributor what in the name of fuck 1G gaearon closed this permanently on 19 Oct 2017

Content FuckltJS Javascript Error Steamroller FuckitJS uses state-of-the-art technology to make sure your javascript code runs whether your compiler likes it or not. Technology Through a process known as Eval-Rinse-Reload-And-Repeat, FuckltJS repeatedly compiles your code, detecting errors and slicing those lines out of the script. To survive such a violent process, FuckltJS reloads itself after each iteration, allowing the onerror handler to catch every single error in your terribly written code. Installation 1. Include Query, because everything requires Query 2. Include "fuckit.is" 3. The End

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Content PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT HAS ALMOST NO STANDARD LIBRARY SOLUTION: THOUSANDS OF COMMUNITY -SUPPORTED LIBRARIES OF WILDLY VARYING QUALITY PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT HAS NO PACKAGING OR A LINKER TO TIE THESE PACKAGES TOGETHER PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT WON'T RUN OUTSIDE THE BROWSER SOLUTION: V8 PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT IS SINGLE -THREAD BY DESIGN SOLUTION: ASYNCHRONOUS PROGRAMMING, NODE. JS PROBLEM: CALLBACK HELL PROBLEM: PROTOTYPAL INHERITANCE IS PANTS -ON- HEAD STUPID THAT'S RIGHT, I SAID IT. PROBLEM: WEB RESOURCES NEED TO BE MINIFIED AND ZIPPED FOR PERFORMANCE PROBLEM: THE DOM IS TOO SLOW FOR VIDEO GAMES SOLUTION: CANVAS PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT IS TOO SLOW FOR VIDEO GAMES SOLUTION: USE AN ASSEMBLY- LIKE SUBSET OF JAVASCRIPT CALLED ASM.JS PROBLEM: ASM.JS IS BASICALLY UNWRITABLE 4 HUMANS. SOLUTION: COMPILE A BETTER LANGUAGE TO JAVASCRIPT (C, EMASCRIPT 2016, COFFEESCRIPT, JSX) SOLUTION: HUNDREDS OF COMMUNITY SUPPORTED BUILD TOOLS OF WILDLY VARYING QUALITY PROBLEM: GRUNT. SOLUTION: GULP PROBLEM: GULP PROBLEM: MACHINE GENERATED OUTPUT IS MORE DIFFICULT TO DEBUG PROBLEM: ASYNC IS STILL A NIGHTMARE, HUH? PROBLEM: BALLOONING PROJECT SIZE AND COMPLEXITY PROBLEM: JAVASCRIPT STILL DOESN'T DO EVERYTHING PROBLEM: OUTPUT RUNS VERY SLOWLY ON MOBILE DEVICES SOLUTION: ELECTRON, PHONEGAP, FIREFOXOS HOW IS DIGGING GOING TO GET US OUT OF THIS HOLE? WHERE I AM FROM, THE POINT OF DIGGING IS NOT FREEDOM FROM DIGGING

Ah, the classic tech industry paradox! Job listings demanding a decade of experience from people who've barely had time to learn how to tie their shoes. This baby's got the right idea—start cramming HTML before you can even form complete sentences. Next up on the reading list: "React for Toddlers" and "Kubernetes Before Kindergarten." The tech hiring market is so absurd that we're basically expecting fetuses to have contributed to open source projects. Should've started coding in the womb if you wanted that entry-level position!