Absolute Menace To Society

Behold the digital archeology exhibit of peak internet culture! That silhouette is bowing to the holy relics of an era when Clippy was your most reliable therapist and your MySpace Top 8 determined your social worth. Remember installing Windows from 12 separate CDs? Or when Flash games were the pinnacle of procrastination technology? This was computing before everything became a subscription service with rounded corners and minimalist icons. Back when "this is not a virus" was definitely a virus, MSN status messages were Shakespearean poetry, and Neopets taught an entire generation about digital pet neglect and basic HTML. The raw, unfiltered chaos of early web design was beautiful in its ugliness—like finding art in a dumpster fire.

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of project managers questioning my PRECIOUS collection of 1000+ unused libraries! 💅 Listen, sweetheart, I don't come to YOUR desk and question why you have 47 Gantt charts for a project that was supposed to be done LAST YEAR. These libraries are my emotional support dependencies! Some developers collect stamps, I collect npm packages that I might use someday in that hypothetical perfect project that exists only in my dreams. And YES, our build time is 4 hours and our node_modules folder is larger than the known universe, but LOOK AT ALL THESE PRETTY PACKAGES! They're just sitting there... being neat! Is that a crime now?!

Content Molly Struve A mollystruve Developer accused of unreadable code refuses to comment 1:18 AM 21 Jan 20 Twitter Web App 4,393 Retweets 208 Quote Tweets 17K Likes

When some Gen Alpha kid in 2064 tries to explain Alt+F4 to you like it's revolutionary tech... Listen here, youngster. I've been refreshing browsers since before your parents were born. I've witnessed the birth of keyboard shortcuts, survived the IE6 era, and debugged code on dial-up. Alt+F4 isn't just a command—it's a relic from an age when we had to trick interns into closing their work with it. The ancient keyboard arts weren't taught; they were suffered through .

Content Clive Thompson pomeranian99 I'm bored of URL shorteners, so I'm gonna start using snipeyhead and mikelacher's "Shady URL": shadyurl.comcreate.php It takes any normal URL and turns it into something that looks like it'll click through to a super-dodgy site crawling with syphilitic javascript 100 ShadyURL Don't just shorten your URL, make it suspicious and frightening. http:www.clivethompson.net is now http:www.528.infocreditscorec1x4qqinitdownload Try another 4:45 pm 24 Sep 2020 Twitter Web App 43 Retweets 8 Quote Tweets 175 Likes

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