The JavaScript Ecosystem Rollercoaster

OMG, the TRAGEDY of dating a programmer! While she's over there having a full-blown relationship crisis, this man's brain is LITERALLY SHORT-CIRCUITING over why arrays start at zero instead of one! THE AUDACITY! 💀 His girlfriend thinks he's mentally cheating, but he's just mentally debugging the universe's indexing choices. The relationship is in shambles while he's contemplating the existential horror of zero-based indexing. PRIORITIES, PEOPLE!

Flash is the tech equivalent of a zombie apocalypse survivor. Adobe officially killed it in 2020, but here it is in 2025, crawling back from the grave with that red logo turned blue like it's wearing a disguise. "I lived, b*tches!" The number of legacy systems still running Flash is the real horror story here. Some ancient enterprise app is probably keeping the entire financial sector hostage with its Flash dependency. The developers who can maintain it are either retired or charging consultant rates that would make a surgeon blush.

Content sketchjs 1 function setup() createCanvas (512, 512); Image img loadImage( "ToothlessMeme.jpg"); function draw() 9 11 12 13 14 15 16 Image Placement image(img, 0, 0, img.width4, img.height4); Text Size and Color fill (255); textSize (25); 18 19 20 211 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 ProarammerHumor.io First Panel Text text("Me spending 2 hours", 145,35); text ("making a meme in", 160,65); text ("JavaScript", 210, 95); Second Panel Text text ("My parents wanting", 25,291); text ("me to be working", 40,321); text("on my college apps" ',25,351); Third Panel Text text ("The 30 people", 307,291) text ("that upvote", 325, 321); Me spending 2 hours making a meme in JavaScript My parents wanting me to be working on my college apps The 30 people that upvote

Content I MADE A BOOKIIT'G OUT ON MAY 13 A CHILDREN'S BOOK THAT'S ALSO FOR GROWN UPS: MY NAME 15 404. PRE-ORDER IT ON AMAZON! QUAX NET SPAGHETTI CODE TANGLED, INTERTWINED, MESSY. CHANGING SOMETHING ON ONE SIDE WILL BREAK SOMETHING THE THER. TRYING TO TAME THIS BE AST WILL LEAVE LOT OF PEOPLE COLORED RED LASAGNA CODE LAYERS. LAYERS, AND THEN SOME MORE LAYERS. OH, YOU WANT TO ACCESS SOME PROPERTY FROM CLASS X? SORRY, NO CAN 2; AND BAFE TO ACCESS IF MAYBE YOU CAN GO THROUGH CLASSES OR MAYBE IT'S EASIER TO DO AN API CALL TO YOUR OWN SERVICE JUST SO OU HAVE ALL THE DATA YOU NEED RAVIOLI CODE WAY TOO MANY MODULESNODESCLASSES. AND THEYRE ALL TIN. WHaT DOES THIS DO? BUT THEN WHaT'S THaT? WHY IS THIS SPLIT UP IN FIVE CLASSES? DO WE REALLY NEED A MODULE FOR SIMPLE IS-ODD CHECK DON'T PUT EVERY 7 FUCKING LINES IN ITS OWN CLASS, DAVE. GNOCCHI CODE UNREADABLE BLOBS OF CODE. YOU CAN TELL THERE'S A LOT GOING ON INSIDE, BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT. CHANGING THESE DENSE CHUNKS OF UNREADABILITY AFTER THE FACT SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE. IT'LL BREAK APART FOR SURE. SPAGHETTI CODE IN THE CLOUD THIS IS YOUR FUTURE. EMBRACE YOUR NEW OVERLORD. COEDITS tO MOD ProarammerHumor.io CONSOLIA-COMIC.COM

Content Boolean (0) false Boolean("0") true 0 "0" f true 6. JS Well yes, but actually no

Content You studied for 15 years but somewhere out there there's a nerdy teen who learned Vue.js in 2 months on Udemy and made a Tinder For Cats app that's making more money than you're ever gonna make in your entire career