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Ah, the beautiful perversion of incentive structures! When your bonus depends on closing tickets, suddenly every minor inconvenience becomes a golden opportunity. Why solve one problem when you can create two more?
This IT hero isn't just thinking outside the box—they're actively stealing boxes from other departments to generate more tickets. The perfect corporate ecosystem: create problems, solve problems, profit.
Next week on "How to Game the System": unplugging random network cables and convincing the marketing department that their monitors work better upside down.
