It Works On My Machine

Content Zoe Schiffer ZoeSchiffer NEW: Email from Elon to the engineering team: "Anyone who can actually write software, please report to the 10th floor at 2pm today. Before doing so, please email me a bullet point summary of what your code commits have achieved in the past 6 months" 1 10:26 pm 18 Nov 22 Twitter Web App I CAN WRITE SOFTWARE master.musktwitter.com ICAN WRITE SOFTWARE Dear Master Musk. Below is a Bullet Point Summary of what my code commits have achieved in the past 6 months Some Fixes . Some More Fixes More Fixes for past Fixes Fixes for pastleft out Fixes Few fixes for the future Fixes Fixes for the Fixes of Fixes And other very crucial, very important and highly optimized code refactor of critical modules here on Twitterfor.umm.. ..minor fixes. Wu. LoL I 5 d Sans Serif TT. B I U A Send

The sacred commandment of software development! GitHub Projects is basically preaching the gospel with this one. Pushing code to production on Friday is like playing Russian roulette with your weekend. That stick figure is all of us—arms raised in desperate warning because they've lived through the horror of fixing critical bugs at 11 PM on a Friday while their friends are out having fun. The universal developer trauma captured in one perfect tweet. Whoever deploys on Friday clearly wants chaos as a lifestyle choice.

Content Programmer Morale morale D searching for bug I bug fixed

This meme perfectly captures the existential crisis of every high-level programmer who dares peek under the hood. Top panel shows a clean, elegant C/C++ function to check if a number is odd with a simple bitwise operation. Bottom panel reveals the assembly code equivalent that looks like it's summoning a demon. The reaction face says it all - "You thought you were writing clean code? That's cute. Meanwhile, the compiler is in the back doing dark magic rituals with registers and bit operations." This is why most of us stay comfortably nestled in our high-level languages, blissfully ignorant of the eldritch horrors happening at the assembly level.

Content Hays Stanford haysstanford 24 Feb Tell me you are a developer without saying 'I'm a developer." 689 17 202 1,115 Tarek Jellali 3 tarekjellali Replying to haysstanford Roses are red, Violets are blue, Unexpected token at line 42. 20:50 24 Feb 21 Twitter for Android

The infamous C pointer syntax strikes again! This monstrosity void (*(*f[])())()) is the stuff of nightmares for even seasoned developers. It's basically C's way of saying "I heard you like functions, so I put functions in your functions so you can call while you call." Reading C declarations is like solving a puzzle where the prize is existential dread. The "F" in C definitely stands for "Fun with memory management until you segfault at 2AM and question your career choices."