I Just Mute All Notifications

Ah, the sophisticated art of problem-solving! Why spend hours debugging your broken code when you can simply delete the linter and live in blissful ignorance? It's like covering the check engine light with duct tape instead of fixing your car. Sure, the code still crashes in production, but at least those pesky red squiggly lines aren't hurting your feelings anymore. Modern problems require modern solutions—just not particularly good ones.

Congratulations! You've achieved peak programmer efficiency by making your broken code run 0.002% faster. The compiler might be screaming, the logic might be completely backward, and your future self will definitely curse your name—but hey, that apostrophe optimization is something to put on your resume. "Debugged code? No. Made wrong code slightly more efficient at being wrong? Absolutely."

The eternal dance between developers and specifications! First they ask if you followed the spec, and you confidently say "YUP." Then they ask if you read it again, and you double down with another "YUP." But when they actually compare your implementation to the spec... surprise! Your code is doing its own interpretive dance routine that barely resembles what was requested. Yet somehow when asked a final time if you followed the spec, you're still answering "YUP" with the unwavering confidence of someone who's never been wrong in their life. This is basically every code review I've ever been part of. Specs are more like vague suggestions anyway, right?

Content Having a bug and thinking it's just a semicolon that's missing The code is 100 correct and there must be an error in the programming language It's probably the compiler It isn't the compiler and the error must be in the ALU of the CPU The CPU is fine and the error must be inside logic of basic set theory itself Seems like I just found an error in the fabric of the universe It was a missing semicolon all time long

Content I WILL TAKE CARE OF THAT LATER. Year 30,828 edit Beginning 14 September 30,828, Windows will not accept dates beyond this day and on startup, Windows will display an error regarding "invalid system time" in NTFS.

BEHOLD! The two species of folder-namers that walk among us! In one corner, we have the innocent optimist who names folders with actual meaningful words like "memories" with ✨sparkles✨ because apparently their hard drive is a scrapbook from 2007. And then there's the keyboard-smashing GREMLIN who creates absolute abominations like "bsydvdkke" and then—THE AUDACITY—creates ANOTHER unintelligible folder name so similar that even the computer is throwing a tantrum! "b♪yd-dkkke already exists" it screams in yellow warning! This is why your projects are DOOMED. You'll never find that important file again. It's lost forever in the void of consonants you created in your 2am coding frenzy. Future you will WEEP.