The SQL Caps Lock Crusade

Content BANK ASKS YOU TO PICK A NEW PASSWORD TWICE A YEAR WITH AT LEAST 1 DIGIT AND 1 SPECIAL CHARACTER STORES PASSWORDS IN PLAINTEXT ingflip.com

Ah yes, the classic client scope creep. First panel: "Make me a portfolio website?" Simple enough, just slap some HTML and CSS together, maybe a touch of JavaScript. Second panel: "Now make me a simple store. How hard can it be?" Suddenly you need React, MySQL, authentication, payment processing, and whatever that circuit diagram is supposed to be. Probably the client's "simple" idea for a recommendation algorithm that "just works like Amazon's but better." It's like asking someone to build a doghouse and then casually requesting they add an infinity pool and home theater while they're at it. Because you know, how hard can it be?

Oh look, it's the modern developer's daily ritual! That moment when you check what you stepped in and discover it's not regular garbage—it's AI Generated SQL . The perfect representation of what happens when you let AI write your database queries. Sure, it looks like SQL from a distance, but examine it closely and you'll find a horrifying abomination that would make even the most battle-hardened DBA weep. Nothing says "I've made terrible life choices" quite like debugging code that was hallucinated by an algorithm with the database knowledge of a caffeinated squirrel. Next time just write the query yourself, unless you enjoy explaining to your boss why the production database is suddenly identifying as a toaster.

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Content Over the break, many of you may have forgotten your passwords. So I've taken the liberty of printing them up for you. You have access to all our passwords in plaintext? It's for security purposes. This actually happened. fuzzyzillacomics

Content Born Died Alma mater Awards Edsger Wybe Dijkstra 11 May 1930 Rotterdam, Netherlands 6 August 2002 (aged 72) Nuenen, Netherlands Leiden University (8.5., M.S.) University of Amsterdam (Ph.D.J SIGCSE Outstanding Contribution (1989) Turing Award (1972) ACM Fellow (1994) Dijkstra Prize (2002)