From Table Select Row: The SQL Rebellion

Ah yes, the elegant solution of cramming a jumbo jet into a cargo plane—just like trying to shove your beautiful, flexible JSON data into the rigid, tabular prison of SQL. Database architects be like: "It technically fits if we disassemble the wings, normalize the engines into separate tables, and pretend those nested objects don't exist!" Meanwhile, NoSQL developers are watching this disaster unfold while sipping tea.

Content Me after doing a simple SQL query (180654 rows affected) (I'm absolutely cooked)

Content 7:47 4 We have LOI's with two major companies. This role also has the potential for upward mobility into a CTO position. We also have the potential to attract Job Types: Contract, Temporary, Internship Pay: 10.00 per hour Benefits: Flexible schedule Professional development assistance Schedule: 4 hour shift 8 hour shift Day shift Monday to Friday Night shift Weekend availability People with a criminal record are encouraged to apply Education: Master's (Required) Experience: Python: 5 years (Required) SQL: 5 years (Preferred) Django: 2 years (Preferred) React: 2 years (Preferred) GPT: 2 years (Required) Language: Apply now

Content Avloren 13 hr. ago Every project, even the ones you code solo, has at least three devs: past you, present you, and future you. And past you was an idiot. 184 Reply Share merlinblack 12 hr. ago present me is pretty dumb too 4 74 Reply Share JackSpyder 12 hr. ago Yeah that guy is the worst to work with. Reply Share sad bug killer 11 hr. ago Nah, present me can be reasoned with if I catch him doing something stupid Past me, on the other hand, is a lazy incompetent prick that left long ago and took all his tiny knowledge with him 4 22 3 Reply Share JackSpyder 11 hr. ago Yeah and future you is like super smart skd clever and can easily figure this out by reading this code so no real need for docs or comments.

The tech world's most pointless debate that somehow causes more arguments than tabs vs spaces. Is it "day-ta" or "dah-ta"? The answer depends entirely on whether you went to school in the US or literally anywhere else on the planet. Liam's response is gold because your brain automatically reads both pronunciations differently in the same sentence. It's like that GIF/JIF war, except nobody's built an entire career around being pretentious about data pronunciation... yet. Fun fact: The Latin origin "datum" suggests "dah-ta" is technically more correct, but good luck explaining etymology to your PM during standup when they ask about the "day-ta pipeline."

Content Memory Dump Old MacDonald had a farm LAnd on his farm he had a farm POp. What the E-I-E-I-O E-I-E-I-O With a farm, farm here A problen has been detected and Mindows MEMORY RANAGEMENT If this is the first time you've seen this Stop error screen, restart your computer. If this screen appears again, follow these steps: Check to make sure any new hardware or software is properly installed. If this is a new installation, ask your hardware or software I Windows updates you wight need. If problens continue, disable or renove any newly installed hardware or Disable BIOS memory options such as caching or shadowing. If you need to use Sate rode to ed scar as disable, component select ast your computer, press Beginning dump of physical men Physical Contact your systen administrator or technical support group for further And a farmaim threeee Made possible by Patrons like: Keith Richards Alarmingly Bad 2021 Jon Baker AlarminglyBad.com