Crashing Prod With Our Best Of Intentions

Content rgatekeeping 27.4k y 1.5k Share Award drdeadkin 13h Oh? You like environmentalism? Name every environment Reply 642 delicious desiccant 8h Plains, Savannah, Taiga, Forest, Desert, Mesa, Extreme Hills, Ocean, Ice Plain, and Mushroom, I think? 4 297 jorgtastic 7h 3 2 Awards you forgot "hostile working" 268 Kittimm 3h G 1 Award And Java Runtime 4 69 1

Content When I become a dad ERROR BASED SOL-INJECTIONS for babies

Content FuckltJS Javascript Error Steamroller FuckitJS uses state-of-the-art technology to make sure your javascript code runs whether your compiler likes it or not. Technology Through a process known as Eval-Rinse-Reload-And-Repeat, FuckltJS repeatedly compiles your code, detecting errors and slicing those lines out of the script. To survive such a violent process, FuckltJS reloads itself after each iteration, allowing the onerror handler to catch every single error in your terribly written code. Installation 1. Include Query, because everything requires Query 2. Include "fuckit.is" 3. The End

Content Telmo telmo In Europe we use instead of S when using Query. Tweet bersetzen 10:29 10 Juni 20 Twitter for iPhone

That moment when you accidentally run a query on production instead of staging. First panel: mild panic. Second panel: realizing you just leaked 2.5 billion users' data and your résumé is already outdated. The best part? That smile isn't happiness—it's the face of someone who knows their career just ended but the severance package will be spectacular. Nothing says "database engineer" like casually sipping coffee while committing digital arson.

Content STOP DOING AGILE SOFTWARE WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE SISYPHEAN YEARS OF PROGRAMS yet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for a DAILY STANDUP Wanted to add features anyway for a laugh? We had a tool for that: It was called "WATERFALL" "Yes please give me UNFINISHED software. Please let me work INFINITY hours"- Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged LOOK at what Programmers have been demanding your Respect for all this time, with all the keyboards mice we built for them (This is REAL Programming, done by REAL Programmers): SCRUM PROCESS ????? ??????? ????????????????? "Hello I would like features please" They have played us for absolute fools