The Circus Of C Programming Exams

Microsoft Azure CTO declares C and C++ should be "deprecated" while his entire company runs on it. That's like a fish suggesting water is overrated. Next up: Windows will run on thoughts and prayers instead of kernel code. Meanwhile, Linux kernel devs, game engine programmers, and embedded systems engineers just collectively rolled their eyes so hard they saw their own brain stems.

Oh look, it's the "my code is basically just a long-winded love letter to the compiler" approach. Every single line drowning in comments that explain the blindingly obvious while adding zero actual value. This is what happens when someone takes "document your code" advice and cranks it to 11. You know who writes code like this? The same person who explains what a fork is while handing it to you at dinner. The real irony? After 7 years in the industry, you'll be begging for any comments in the 10,000-line legacy codebase you've inherited. Just not... whatever this crime against syntax highlighting is.

The ultimate family drama of programming languages! C and C++ are asked if they're friends, and C++ enthusiastically says "Yes" while C firmly says "No." Classic one-sided relationship where C++ was literally built on top of C, inheriting all its features and extending them with object-oriented goodness. Meanwhile, C is that stubborn grandpa who refuses to acknowledge the fancy descendant with all those "unnecessary abstractions." It's like C is still mad that C++ took its syntax, added a bunch of complexity, and then had the audacity to put "++" in its name like it's somehow better. The compatibility is strictly one-directional - just like that one friend who always borrows your stuff but never lets you touch theirs.

The x86 instruction set has evolved from sensible mnemonics like mov and add to absurd alphabet soup like xtrsprfstcmd that supposedly does complex math while romancing your mother in a single clock cycle. Impressive efficiency, questionable naming conventions. It's like Intel engineers went from writing readable code to smashing their faces on keyboards while achieving quantum-level performance.

Someone just discovered the increment operator and thinks they're a language polyglot now. The meme shows a guy bragging about using "C++" in JavaScript, but all he's doing is using a standard for loop with c++ as the increment statement. That's like saying you speak French because you can say "croissant" while ordering at Starbucks. The violent reaction in the bottom panel is the only appropriate response to such heresy.

The compiler just performed the most spectacular magic trick in programming history. We've got a C++ program with an infinite while(1) loop and a function literally named unreachable() that should never execute. Yet somehow, when compiled with optimizations, it spits out "Hello world!" anyway. The compiler optimization flags ( -O1 ) basically said "this infinite loop is useless nonsense" and just... skipped it entirely. It's like your code review comments were taken literally by the universe. That moment when the compiler is smarter than your intentionally broken code is both humbling and hilarious.