Want To Start Afight

Content Always has been Wait it's all computers? ProarammerHumor.io

Content Cory Kelley johncoryk 18h Me: googling how to extend a div outside the parent container for like the billionth time.. Other people: I made this with CSS!

Content DON'T KNOW WHY IM BEING PAID 340K TO WRITE YAML BUT AT THIS POINT I'M TOO AFRAID TO ASK

Content When your software draws family trees and you get a recursion error imaflip.com

That existential moment when your entire work identity is so intertwined with a messaging app that its downtime and your employment status become indistinguishable. Remote workers' nightmare fuel right there—can't tell if you're unemployed or just experiencing the classic "have you tried turning it off and on again" corporate solution. The modern day "if a tree falls in the forest" philosophical question!

MongoDB's marketing team really nailed their priorities here. Forget trivial things like your compensation, burnout, or work-life balance - the only legacy that matters is knowing their database is "web scale." For the uninitiated, "web scale" became a tech buzzword after a famous parody video where a MongoDB enthusiast repeatedly screams "it's web scale!" while a MySQL user questions what that actually means. The phrase became shorthand for "sounds impressive but possibly meaningless tech jargon." Nothing says "I've made it in tech" quite like remembering marketing slogans instead of your actual life experiences. Your therapist would have a field day with this one.