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Oh honey, the AUDACITY of these cloud providers! 💅
First, Microsoft Azure is all "Our service is AMAZING!" Then the second you commit, they hit you with "Sorry, it's broken and our devs are too busy updating their LinkedIn profiles to fix it." The betrayal!
Google Cloud's "FREE" service is the tech equivalent of that friend who offers to buy lunch then Venmos you for $47.82 plus tip. FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS?! I could've bought a mediocre gaming PC for that!
And AWS? "It's EASY!" they say, right before you need a PhD in AWSology and an AI assistant just to figure out how to deploy a simple "Hello World." The documentation is basically "Figure it out, genius!"
This is why developers have trust issues and drink coffee by the gallon. The cloud promised us heaven but delivered a very expensive, very complicated hell.
