State Of Certifications: No Hands On

The job market's final boss has arrived! On the left: a job description requiring mastery of 20+ technologies including AWS, Kubernetes, Docker, JavaScript, Python, Linux, security tools like CISSP and Palo Alto, plus NIST compliance and .NET. On the right: the actual job? Excel spreadsheet jockey. It's the classic tech industry bait-and-switch where companies demand you know how to build a nuclear reactor just to change the lightbulbs. The recruiter probably thinks "full-stack" means you can stack paper forms into a full pile.

The double-precision pun here is just *chef's kiss*. The AWS engineer is both literally floating around the world on a yacht AND dealing with the nightmare that is floating-point precision errors in computing. Look at that travel path! That's not efficient navigation—it's what happens when you try to represent decimal numbers in binary. Your GPS says "go straight" but floating-point math says "let me zigzag across the entire Pacific first." I guess when you've spent years battling 0.1 + 0.2 ≠ 0.3 in your code, you deserve to float away from your problems... only to create a visual representation of the exact same problem with your yacht's GPS tracker. The irony is just too perfect .

Content Looking to hire a Jr Data Scientist: - 15 years Python - 30 years SQL - 20 vears AWS -15 years Spark -15 years Terraform - Core contributor to assembly code base - Team plaver - Should have some sort of martial arts experience, whether Ninja, Jujitsu, or Karate. All 3 is preferred. - Knows SQL, NoSQL, NewSQL and all future flavors of SOL - Proiect Management experience - Strong experience with Keras, TensorFlow, Sklearn, XGBoost and preferably has written their own ML library from scratch. - Should have published at least 2 top level academic papers preferably focused around a Convolutional Recurrent Back-propagating Neural Network - Open source contributor at least 5 projects. - Experience leading teams of 10,000 people or more - Managed CICD pipeline for an application with at least 2 billion daily users -Should have at least 1 PhD, 5 is preferred. Yes, we have ping pong tables and an open floor plan and lots of salty snacks in the breakroom. Organic Kombucha on tap. The interviews will consist of a 5 day process of whiteboarding algorithms from scratch followed by writing your own compiler and a coding exam will be taken at random from the 20 most popular programming languages.

Content JavaScript Teacher jstut 2h Your resume: Git SSL Vue CSS PHP Sass Node DOM React HTML CRUD MERN MEVN MEAN Netlify Mongo MySQL Python Docker Angular Fortnite GraphQl Full Stack JAMstack JavaScript TypeScript Kubernetes PostgreSQL Interview decision: Sorry we need someone who knows AWS. 58 17 195 694

Content CATALIN PIT O catalinmpit If your job spec looks like this: HTML, CSS JavaScript, Python NodeJS, GraphQL React AWS Docker Jenkins, Drone Bash scripting Puppet Terraform Kubernetes MySQL, DynamoDB, MongoDB, Aurora You're looking for an entire IT department, not for a developer!

Content uSe tHe clOUd, YOu dOn't nEed to upDaTe aNytHing Action Required AWS Lambda end of support for Python 3.8 AWS Account: US-EAST-11 ProdrammerHumor.io