Don't Be Evil They Said

The bell curve of developer self-awareness strikes again. On the far left, we have blissfully mediocre developers who know they're mediocre and have made peace with it. In the middle, the anxious majority frantically collecting skills like Pokémon cards because some LinkedIn influencer told them to. And on the far right, the enlightened souls who've mastered enough to realize that "mediocre" is just corporate-speak for "has a life outside of Stack Overflow." The true galaxy brain move is accepting your mediocrity while still getting paid the same as the try-hards.

Ah, the classic Fibonacci trap! What the engineer doesn't realize is that calculating the 80th Fibonacci number is actually a computational nightmare with naive recursion. The time complexity is O(2^n) - meaning your algorithm basically doubles its work with each step. While the dad thinks he's asking a simple question, he's actually posing a problem that would make even a decent computer cry. Without memoization or dynamic programming, that poor engineer's PC would probably burst into flames before reaching F(80)! And that, kids, is why you always optimize your algorithms before meeting your girlfriend's father.

OH. MY. GOD. What unholy abomination have we summoned here?! 😱 Some deranged soul decided to write the most NEEDLESSLY COMPLEX lambda function to calculate a mean when they could've just used sum(x)/len(x) ! The audacity! The DRAMA! This is what happens when a Python developer discovers functional programming and decides to BETRAY EVERYTHING Python stands for. It's like watching someone use a nuclear warhead to kill a spider! Whoever wrote this code deserves to be sentenced to maintaining COBOL applications for all eternity!

Remember when we actually had to memorize algorithms and syntax? Now my brain's shrinking faster than my will to whiteboard during interviews. The top image shows Homer Simpson's brain scan before ChatGPT, all plump and functional. The bottom shows what's left after outsourcing our thinking to AI - just enough neurons to type "write me a function that..." and hit enter. Evolution in reverse, folks - soon we'll just be fingers attached to a coffee mug.

BEHOLD! The two genders of tech bros: those who scoff at astrology while those SAME MEN will literally build an entire neural network to figure out if their crush likes them back! 💀 Like, sweetie, you're writing complex AI algorithms with multi-head attention mechanisms to predict relationship outcomes when you could just TEXT HER?! The DRAMA of using gradient descent to calculate the probability of getting back together instead of therapy is just... *chef's kiss* peak engineer behavior! Who needs Mercury retrograde when you've got matrix calculations to tell you you're still single? ICONIC.

The classic programming classroom standoff! When the prof asks for questions, they're expecting softball queries about office hours or the syllabus. Instead, this brave student drops a data structures nuke about traversing binary trees without recursion. The professor's immediate pivot to "about my personal life..." is the universal signal of "I don't remember how to solve this either but will never admit it." The student's quick backpedal is the silent agreement to maintain the professor's dignity. This is basically the CS equivalent of mutually assured destruction.